My wife has been pressuring me to have another kid for a few years. We have been married for 11 years and have a 9 year old.

I don't want to have another kid so she mentions adoption or foster care. In order to placate her I tell her to call them and ask about it. She then proceeded to get us set up as an emergency family if they needed to place a kid for a short period of time.

I forgot about it. Then a week ago we get a call late evening. She answered it and I hear her talking seriously and she asks, "How long will this be for?" This is when my smooth brain lets me know something is up.

Turns out it was a lady with CPS and she needed a place for a kid to stay. She says she will be heading our way.

She showed up with a 12 year old kid that was short and overweight. The father of the kid also showed up with her. Seemed like a nice enough guy, but apparently there was some sort of issue.

CPS lady tells the father he can leave and then talks to us. She didn't go into specifics on the situation, but said there were family issues.

She then tells us all that is wrong with the kid. All sorts of things. OPP, ADHD, and a bunch of other things I didn't really care about. The kid had his own pill box full of pills he takes each day.

Everything goes well the first few days. Though he did have this annoying habit of telling obvious lies. For example, he sees my power rack and tells me he can bench press 100 pounds. He would kill himself if he could even get the weight unracked.

Then after that my kid tells him to get off of the xbox because he wants to play. The kid broke down in uncontrollable tears. I was like:



My son and I had no idea what to do. So we just kind of stared at him. My wife then tries to comfort him and he simmers down after a few minutes.

The next day he has a zoom call with some counselors and his parents. He starts screaming and crying again.

It was like walking on egg shells after that because we didn't want to hear the shrill like crying again.

Anyway, I discovered I am in no way altruistic. Donating money is much easier than a personal sacrifice. So I applaud those that can actually make one.

TLDR

1. Wife suckers me into foster care.
2. Kid was a cry baby.
3. Sooner is a heartless bastard.

Kick the fukker out. Srs

Can’t be very easy for the kid either.

They got him set back up with his parents today. Some kind of in home counseling deal.

The dad was very appreciative of us and wanted the kid back at home. Seems like a good dude that got caught up in a situation in which he had to restrain the kid and it spiraled out of control.

Sounds weird. Feel bad for the kid but would also not want to have something like that being dragged into my own family.

You going to stick with this fostering program or look into having another kid? I’d be worried about having another kid in the house and them picking on my own. Something would just feel off about it.

Phew good dude
Did that help wake your wife up?

Mine wants kids ASAP and she’s only 24. I’m over here like how about we get financially stable first but she acts like she’s already low on eggs lol

Not sure really.

I have a lot of respect for the CPS people now though. Thankless job with terrible pay and random hours. Apparently they have always struggled for places the kids can go and now since COVID they are stacking kids into shelters. Which is apparently bad for most kids.

I'll probably let it play out another time and then I have to make a decision on either having another biological kid or fostering/adoption.

lol, no.

She is even more determined than ever.

Good luck bro! Though I have to say I am very happy with my kiddo, couldn't imagine life without him.

I applaud you for giving it a shot, that's johngoodman, but it's probably not a job for a miscer. Srs.

Fuark I’m sorry dude. Zero percent chance I’d invite that chit in my home.
I appreciate it dude.
I’m honestly warming to the idea when I see little blonde dudes with their dads but fukk having a daughter would be rough man.
Good luck to you bro! Keep fighting the good fight lol

Most foster parents dont care about the kids and get money from the government somehow. Also I knew a bunch of kids when I was in school that had homosexual foster parents and they were all molested. I guess its a thing now with homosexuals adopting foster kids so they can molest them.

We didn't get paid anything, I'd feel a little guilty taking any honestly.

I'm a little concerned about my reaction to the situation. I think we all believe we are altruistic, now my belief in my own good will has taken a hit.

I wouldn't be so hard on yourself, 12 is a wierd age for kids, and all anyone asks is that you do your part and raise your own, taking in a troubled relative is one thing, but a total stranger, especially one that age, noone could judge you for not wanting to deal with it, I've always said being a step dad is one of the hardest jobs a man can have, because your dealing with problems that aren't necessarily yours, it's underappreciated. We can't all be mother Teresa's.

Bro don’t blame yourself at all. That could’ve been detrimental to your kid or even your wife. Never know man.
You handled yourself fine imo. I feel I’d have definitely been harder on the kid if I were in your shoes. Not gonna act like a manic in my house.