It's scary and and reassuring.

like everything is timeless yet it's all finite and we all gon die at some point.

I've always been an over thinker. My younger stoner self was like heeeey man everyone needs to slow down and just embrace the here and now of this reality. We are all way to rushed, oblivious to the beauty of the present, etc.

But as I've gotten older I find myself gravitating towards being driven, being more goal orientated. It takes the edge off of the meaning driven reality. It's all good to stop and smell the roses. That's a must. But it's not the end all and be all for a sane existence. You have to be focused on...things. It's what gives the self meaning (relationships aside).

It's all a balancing act. I don't think any of us get it right.