“Steroids is now just a word that the lazy and ignorant use to describe any guy that has more muscle and dedication than them”– Mike O'Hearn


"I am like getting the feeling of cumming in the gym; I'm getting the feeling of cumming at home; I'm getting the feeling of cumming backstage; when I pump up, when I pose out in front of 5000 people I get the same feeling, so I am cumming day and night. It's terrific, right? So you know, I am in heaven."

"The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed."

See OptimusTrajan' sig

*Look at reflection in car window and flex every time crew*
*Use half the roll to wipe after a poo crew*
*Fart in the gym and blame rotten smell on faulty ventilation crew*
*Fart at home and blame it on the dog crew*
*Watch neutron-star density poop mock me as water flushes around it and it stays put crew*
*Drive 2 minutes in the summer and back of shirt gets completely wet crew*
*Coffee black as midnight on a moonless night crew*
*Fat shame my cat on a daily basis crew*