Anyone here a (recovered) sex addict? [SRS]

02-07-2023, 05:30 PM

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#1

LogicalLifts
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Anyone here a (recovered) sex addict? [SRS]

One of my coworkers admitted to me today that he has been a sex addict for decades. He isn't married, but he took a girl from one of our "documentation" rooms out to a bar at lunch and fu*ked her in the bathroom. He admitted to me that he is growing increasingly reckless as he gets older, and that he has been told for decades by women he has dated that he is an addict.

I wondered what this means in the sense, could this sex addiction be a primary reason behind divorce rates? I googled 'Sex Addicts Anonymous' but it all seems to be based on religion - reading a 'green book' in Churches.

I feel bad for my coworker - I think he's the kind of guy that was bullied in HS and bloomed later, and he just can't stop smashing. I think the addiction is probably the fact that it is becoming increasingly risky etc.

Have any of you gone through something like this, and - were you able to recover? Please respect the [SRS] tag.

02-07-2023, 05:34 PM

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#2

JustiNtense

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Imagine thinking that it's a problem to do what you are biologically wired to do and a core purpose of a man.

02-07-2023, 05:35 PM

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#3

redmelly
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My brother is a therapist and he's treated people for this, with a really good success rate.

But if he's not married I don't see much of a problem. Who is going to get mad?

02-07-2023, 05:39 PM

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#4

WoofieNugget

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I thought I was for a while because after my divorce I was a complete manwhore. Did a lot of risky things, slept with a ton of women, cheated on partners, etc. Just didn't give a crap about anything but getting laid. Not a good place to be. Even attended a few SAA meetings but the stories there didn't really resonate with me and it seemed to be a place where guys just came to confess how awful they were and they continually relapsed.

I took a good look at myself and did a lot of learning and realized that it was just my way of gaining back the self-confidence I either lost or never had. Once I got to the point where I could get sex on demand, suddenly it stopped being so important. I still explored, but it was totally different because it was controlled and honest, and now I'm quite happy with a girl who is awesome and have no urge to do anything like I used to.

Your coworker probably gets a big rush from the planning, the hunt and the anticipation, not the act itself. Plus the guilt or adrenaline afterwards. That's the big sign of an addict in my opinion.

02-07-2023, 05:39 PM

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#5

koreannoodles77
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Yea I couldn't stop doing your mom

had to get help

Im better now

But I still do your mom srs

02-07-2023, 05:40 PM

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#6

JuicePro
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Originally Posted By JustiNtense⏩

Imagine thinking that it's a problem to do what you are biologically wired to do and a core purpose of a man.

I can definitely see it becoming a problem at times. Ie prioritizing sex over work, school responsibilities, etc.

Hell, I've done some risky sexual activity too, while disregarding everything else, so it's definitely something to keep an eye out for and keep in check.

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02-07-2023, 05:42 PM

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#7

johnnydeep1
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Yeah, I was from the 8-12th grade. Couldn’t control it though because girls would beg to date me

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02-07-2023, 05:42 PM

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#8

mikebadg3

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Yeah

I just thought about all the time wasted chasing vanity and the thoughts associated and thought when is enough enough? That I can put my energy to more productive ventures

02-07-2023, 05:46 PM

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#9

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Wouldn't call trying to get laid an addiction. Maybe if you started calling in sick to work just so you could bang strange it might start getting to that point.

02-07-2023, 05:57 PM

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#10

LogicalLifts
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Originally Posted By JustiNtense⏩

Imagine thinking that it's a problem to do what you are biologically wired to do and a core purpose of a man.

You may have missed this part of the OP:

Originally Posted By LogicalLifts⏩

He admitted to me that he is growing increasingly reckless as he gets older, and that he has been told for decades by women he has dated that he is an addict.
I think the addiction is probably the fact that it is becoming increasingly risky etc.

If you think the 'core purpose' of a man includes sneaking out of a very highly paid, secure office space, with a coworker, and taking her to a bar to pound her during the lunch break - well, I hope you live your life that way. You missed the "increasingly risky" part of the OP.

Originally Posted By redmelly⏩

My brother is a therapist and he's treated people for this, with a really good success rate.

But if he's not married I don't see much of a problem. Who is going to get mad?

Why is it about getting mad? He reached out to me because he is losing control, was that not clear from the OP? Do you think, e.g., that a CFO sneaking out of a Rank 1 salaried place of work with someone from a documents room to pound her in a bar is "not a problem"? There are folks on this forum who swear against even pounding someone from the same office...

02-07-2023, 06:05 PM

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#11

redmelly
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Originally Posted By LogicalLifts⏩

You may have missed this part of the OP:

If you think the 'core purpose' of a man includes sneaking out of a very highly paid, secure office space, with a coworker, and taking her to a bar to pound her during the lunch break - well, I hope you live your life that way. You missed the "increasingly risky" part of the OP.

Why is it about getting mad? He reached out to me because he is losing control, was that not clear from the OP? Do you think, e.g., that a CFO sneaking out of a Rank 1 salaried place of work with someone from a documents room to pound her in a bar is "not a problem"? There are folks on this forum who swear against even pounding someone from the same office...

I don't know... I meant there is no marriage involved to blow up so I guess that's a positive in all this. I used to work at a place where people would hook up a lot. Not the CFO but the CEO did date and marry his assistant. If he's feeling it's out of hand, like I mentioned, therapy is always an option.

02-07-2023, 06:06 PM

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#12

ToxMasculinity
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Just sounds like a high test male. (Ded fkn Srs)

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02-07-2023, 06:07 PM

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#13

Pats2022SBwin
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Originally Posted By JustiNtense⏩

Imagine thinking that it's a problem to do what you are biologically wired to do and a core purpose of a man.

remember being told in Catholic School i was going to hell if i masterbated

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02-07-2023, 06:11 PM

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#14

johnnydeep1
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Originally Posted By johnnydeep1⏩

Yeah, I was from the 8-12th grade. Couldn’t control it though because girls would beg to date me

AGE-28
Wt-165
HT-5'10"
Bench-100 dumbbell press-5 reps
*Mechanical Engineer*

02-07-2023, 06:14 PM

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#15

LogicalLifts
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Originally Posted By WoofieNugget⏩

I thought I was for a while because after my divorce I was a complete manwhore. Did a lot of risky things, slept with a ton of women, cheated on partners, etc. Just didn't give a crap about anything but getting laid. Not a good place to be. Even attended a few SAA meetings but the stories there didn't really resonate with me and it seemed to be a place where guys just came to confess how awful they were and they continually relapsed.

I took a good look at myself and did a lot of learning and realized that it was just my way of gaining back the self-confidence I either lost or never had. Once I got to the point where I could get sex on demand, suddenly it stopped being so important. I still explored, but it was totally different because it was controlled and honest, and now I'm quite happy with a girl who is awesome and have no urge to do anything like I used to.

Your coworker probably gets a big rush from the planning, the hunt and the anticipation, not the act itself. Plus the guilt or adrenaline afterwards. That's the big sign of an addict in my opinion.

Yeah, you get where he's coming from. Were the SAA meetings based on religion, too? That's what some google searching told me.

I called him again to check, he's in quite a state. I mean when he does things like this he's risking a lot, and people don't seem to get that ITT. And he's getting off on that, and he's super guilty now at night. This isn't about 'picking up a woman and smashing her', it's about (again folks):

1. Tier 1 employer very high status/prestige/income;
2. Flirting with a documentation girl and;
3. Taking her out through security together to;
4. Go to a dive bar and;
5. Fu*k her in the bathroom; and
6. Go back to the office.

I'm glad Woofie that you're doing better. This guy seems to be in that "not a good place" you mention. He is doing increasingly risky stuff like this, might get caught, has a lot on the line, and every time he is racked with guilt he ends up doing something even more risky.