Life has been kicking me in the cock lately, cant seem to catch a break. Keep powering through, but ego is bruised and confidence is lower by the day.

Anyone got some good bootstraps stories of how they got their lives back in order? Was at the absolute top of my game no more than 12 months ago, now I'm at what I'd consider rock bottom universally. I hate rotting, so I rot harder every moment that I'm not winning, which is every second of every day.

Thanks in advance. measly reps for helpful words

I was on top of my game a few years back, everything was going my way it seemed. Then i took a L due to lack of confidence and it seemed to snowball. I agree with the brah who said its mental. Now things are finally turning for me, but it all starts in the head

Don't stop beleaf

Edit -
Another thing I'll say is be grateful for what's going right in your life SRS

Back when things were going right for me, I didn't appreciate them so they didn't even really matter. If I was more appreciative, I would've enjoyed what I had better when I had it.

I should've taken advantage of a lot more opportunities at that time but i didn't appreciate them to begin with

When it rains it pours brah but you just got to see through the storm. Realize as bad as whatever you are going through is, it can be much worse. Assuming you didnt receive a terminal diagnosis - then ANY situation you are and Ls you are taking are in the grand scheme very minor. You F up and lost your job at work? Guess what, there are millions of other jobs out there and no one gives a chit. Someone broke up with you? Shes just a sloot and did you a favor. Lost a bunch of money on some misc investment strategies? When you are on your death bed that chit wont even cross your mind.

If you have the money and time to do it, might be worth traveling. Really clears your mind quite a bit - and when you go to another country you realize just how big the world is and how insignificantly small your tiny world thats giving you trouble at the moment is. Once you get some quick, small wins, the momentum will carry forward to bigger ones OP believe me


Good and bad things often happen in waves. You got to stop this downward ball of BS rolling right now and start focusing the next few weeks on getting those small wins you need to get that swagger back.

Happens. I went through a similar phase for a few months recently, like I lost all drive and purpose. But really I lost connection to my inner self and let fear and stress get the better of me. I think Im starting to get that spark back again, but it took a long time of processing different emotions and figuring out more about myself and what makes me tick.

Take some time to reassess where you're at in life. Go for walks, clear your head, and figure out your next move. All it takes is some self reflection and looking at things objectively. Often times we get lost in the bullchit of life and forget what we're actually fighting for.

Also worth noting that depressive/bad periods are just a part of life. Doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong, its just the nature of things. You gotta take the good with the bad, can't have one without the other nomsayin.

Stay strong boyo you'll get thru this.

Yes.

It’s more of a take it one day at a time, and compounding effort sort of rise back up.

Think of it like having debt; you sometimes have to push harder to return to zero.

So instead of doing everything all at once you focus on small things. You find little ways to make your life a better place. Find small kindnesses that you can impart upon others.

I moved to a new city a few years ago, and got fired from my job. Unemployment didn’t cover my bills and I basically went deep into debt trying to prevent myself from having to move all the way back. I was at the end of my lease and it was looking pretty grim.


Some things that helped me:
-I reduced my bills by moving to a smaller space
-Fullhermitmode.jpg - no spending money on outings etc
-I found another job after months of searching, that I actually enjoyed
-I increased my credit by getting back on track with my bills, and then took out a loan to consolidate my debt
-I began to volunteer for my local shelter, and foster cats; life handed me a kindness and it was my time to return it
-I started some new hobbies like bouldering, and got back into some old ones like BJJ
-I actively started seeking new friendships, and started hosting dinners, game nights and friends at my apartment
-I called my parents often, and spent a lot of time rebuilding my relationship with them
-I called friends I hadn’t spoken to, to make sure we stayed in touch. I tried to devote at least an hour or two a week to do that.
-I’ve reached out to other people who I’ve burned bridges with when in my weird headspace, to attempt to repair old wounds. It didn’t always work, but it did help me feel a little better about it. I have attempted to learn from these things.
-I hyper focused on getting more skilled at my new job, and am now making twice what I was when I started because of commissions



-Life is good

smooching gals usually helps srs

-take the lessons from the past as very valuable advice that you were destined to learn for your present and future

-the next time you look back with regret, observe your thoughts. if you do this right you can catch 'yourself' aka ego right in the middle
of creating negativity. when you catch your ego doing that it is a glorious moment as the ego slinks away knowing it's been caught. you then
realize definitively that you are not your negative thoughts.

-look 5 years into the future and ask yourself what you want. then write down a plan and everyday will the future into the present.

-everyone is in their own personal hell. that's not meant to be a downer but a positive note. we are not competing with anyone but our own ego and are here to learn, grow, evolve and ultimately, with the grace of God, achieve enlightenment.

Trying brah. One day at a timeCant agree more. I really squandered some good things because I was too busy not appreciating them and hating on them when they really weren't that bad. Two great jobs that I didn't take advantage of, now I'm looking for my third and want to give it my all and find a path to success instead of a wall of self induced adversity.have a GF, not sure how anymore, but she sticks around.


Repped everyone I could, forum was acting up the last two days and I couldn't access the thread.

Just need a job, and to kick some vices, and life really won't be so bad.

Yes, in fact I have done it twice. I fell from my absolute peak to a literal mental health facility within 2 months. Make fun of me if you would like, but I clawed my fukkin way back and slowly got off every pill they gave me in that shyt hole. Everything that happened to me in that downward spiral was self imposed. But I 100% recovered. And when I faced my 2nd major life hurdle (this time, mostly from factors out of my control) I knew how to handle it and used the previous experience to my advantage. I'm so thankful for the lessons learned.

You need to understand a few things, the first one is that no ones can understand or care about the way you feel. No doctor, no women, but if you have any very close friends you can lean on them for support just know that they don't understand. The hardest thing is to stop thinking about it and move on eventually you regain momentum.

You need to understand the power of momentum. You know when your watching a sport and you can tell momentum has shifted? Although a team is down you know momentum is now in their favor? This happens in life and you need to feel it and respect it, then use it to your advantage. So right now you are in a downward spiral and momentum is against you. Your goal needs to be slowing down the downward momentum. You can't turn it around overnight so you just need to whether the storm and get through it before you start to thrive again. Do very small things to achieve this. Pick one positive action you can do, possibly something you have been avoiding. (IE, take a cold shower, lift heavy weights, call someone you miss, work on your resume). Do one fukking thing for yourself that's going to make you achieve something. Understand that the worst, is very very bad and dark. You don't need to go there to find out how bad it is just be thankful for what you have. On any day, you or any of your loved ones could die or become permanently disabled. Life is short and fragile. Also, don't forget to have fun. You can have small fun or happy moments no matter if you are at your low or high. Everyone is different but I usually find something to laugh about. Obviously those times are much more common when you are doing well but that doesn't mean they don't still happen. You can't punish yourself all the time just because things aren't going your way.

Anyway, through a series of very small actions you eventually slow down the downward momentum and then you can start to improve. And when you feel this happening DON'T LET IT GO. It's all on you, even the very best of friends or family can only really give you a pat on the back or someone to talk to. Now things are moving in your favor, DON"T DO WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME. don't lose the momentum. Take it and ride it to new higher highs. This is all though working hard, doing things others avoid, being yourself, and having a positive attitude. When the wind is at your back you just use everything to your favor and ride it. When you are facing adversity and headwinds, you just acknowledge it and do what you can to not lose what you have and start spiraling again. Sometimes you will just need to tread water. Play defense, you might not be scoring points but your avoiding losing them. Opportunity won't always be there but you are simply putting yourself into a position to take advantage when the opportunity arises. Strike while the irons hot. Get it while the gettin' is good. When you have your confidence back you will likely have more sympathy for those who are not as lucky. You will be more thankful next time.

We are all so different and this might not make sense to you. But TLDR; fuk yea you can get your mojo back. Ive done it twice and I'll stop when I'm dead! PS: Don't forget to not be a pussy.

Let me know if you find out
I lost mine badly in early January when I got canned by my ex

Trying to stay positive

On a new thing where I keep telling myself " I'm going to win again "

Now I just need to believe it

Wicked Witch

Seems to happen in fairly regular cycles for me. Start out:

-working out regularly and intensely
-studying regularly
-trying to learn new skills and improve current skills
-working hard at job
-trying to maintain and improve relationships with wife, family, and friends

Then one day wake up and everything feels pointless. Start withdrawing from interacting with people. Lose interest in hobbies, have no drive or energy. Ruminate on things I didn't do or should have done better (like someone else mentioned, oftentimes reflect on times when I had great opportunities but squandered them).

Then start to feel better usually after doing some kind of small cleaning/organizing task, then start exercising intensely again, etc. Rinse and repeat every few weeks for the past 14 years, lol

tldr:
-completing small tasks can help restore mojo

Human brain is whacky, and isn’t hardwired to accept complacency, and sometimes makes you experience dissatisfaction in order to get you to experience different things.

It’s a bit wild, but absolutely spot on that you should be doing small tasks to help restore mojo.

Happiness is like a little garden and you gotta tend it!

One trick that really helps is to do a complete overhaul of what your week looks like every now and then. Or every now and then, just taking a day off work to go on an adventure/day trip.

Damn

Austin Powers I think did

Man this is some serious nostalgia

Austin Powers was everywhere when I was a kid. AP merch was in almost every store and we had a weird Brit culture obsession for a bit, everyone wanted a mini cooper with the Union Jack on it

Core memories slowly returning

What a weird time it was

If you don't have any problems then your mind will create one.

If you were on the "top of your game" and then took a few L's and it ruined you then you really werent on the top like you think.

You should be able to take some losses and recover. Thats what champion athletes do. failure is the reason they are champions in the first place. They all have tasted defeat and used it as a tool to improve.

They say the best ones basically have amnesia. They can do something stupid or drop the ball or suffer a terrible loss and forget about it and get back in there and do it right the next time.

Not busting on you, just trying to give you some perspective on where to possibly improve so this doesnt happen again.

Went through some sh*t with my parents right before I got married, sunk me into a depression for a while. I honestly needed time alone to reset, focus on things I enjoyed (that were productive, listening to music, journaling, exercise, cleaning), then prioritize things that I could control that needed to be done at home and work. It helps having people in your corner, whether you tell them you're going through hard times or not.

My mojo was pretty fuked back in December. Business was slow, I was drinking and doing drugs a bit too often.

I went on a 3 month trip and fuked a bunch of girls and was on the beach basically the entire time. Now I'm back home feeling like a literal million dollars.