If you know you know. Google and forum searches are dead in 2023. Thanks and repped in advance

^negged


Bump

I saw Ryan Geeseling at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

Here is the relationship copypasta:

Why did you buy that? We need this. Oh that is so cute. Your place needs more color. I got you this. What are we doing for X holiday? I was invited to a party, are you coming with me? Do you like my friends? Are you having a good time? I want you to meet more of my friends. When are you going to introduce me to your friends? I think you should meet my parents. My best friend hates you. I don't like your friends. I think so-and-so is a bad influence. Do we have to have them over again? Why are you playing a game? Did you take the trash out? Honey, not now, I'm tired. I have a headache. I am so bloated. Do you love me? You're not going out of town with your friends are you? I'll be so lonely without you. Yes, I know you didn't go with your friends, but this is just a girls night. We're together like all the time. You should go do something, just not with any friends I don't like. Those are off limits.

No, leave me alone. No I'm fine. I know I've been upset for a few days. I was late and I thought I was pregnant. I cried when I wasn't. I never thought of having a baby like this before. Where do you think this relationship is going? We should move in together it will save money too and we'll have more for us. If we're going to live together, I need more space for my stuff too. Unless you're not serious about our relationship. I hate that picture. I can't believe you still have this furniture. I have always hated it. You've got no tastes for decoration. You should pack this other stuff up. I packed this stuff up for you. That packed up stuff is taking up space. You should sell it. Or dump it.

I think I'm late. Yes, I have been taking my pills, but I'm late, it's probably stress. I'm pregnant. I don't know, it happened. What are you going to do about it? For the last time, yes, I always took my birth control. The doctor said that antibiotic I took might have messed it up. Yes, he warned me, but we've not been using protection for so long, I didn't worry about it. We both hate condoms anyway. Don't you love me? Yes of course it is yours. Why are you acting like you don't trust me. Well my friends got engaged, and they weren't even pregnant.

We're going to need a bigger place. We can't raise a baby in a place this small. You need a better job. With both of us working, we'll be fine. I don't feel like going back to work yet. I think I need to stay home with the baby. We'll cut back on some things, we can do it. We need a new car. I know I'm not working, but my car isn't running and I can't be stuck at home all day. I hate being home all day. You go to work, you see people.

You're keeping me stuck at home. You don't love me. All the baby does is cry all day. Yeah, I know you're working, but at least you get out of the house sometime. You never take me anywhere. I know we can't afford a babysitter, but what about my needs? Don't touch me. No, I'm tired. I'm sick. I feel gross. You never want to be with me anymore. How do you think it makes me feel to be rejected by you like that? You were rejected? You felt what? Oh please, that's not even the same thing.

I'm looking for a job. And we need that new car if I am going to work. Yes, ok, I know most of what I earn just pays the daycare. I like not having to stay at home. God I hate my job. Are you trying to be funny? Going to work is not socializing. Does everything have to be about you? Maybe I said that before, but you try being stuck at home all day. I think I am going to quit my job. Well, it's better than going to work all the time. I'll figure something out. I think the baby should be in daycare a few days a week so I can do errands easier. Why are you complaining?

Why don't we have any money. OK, I know I agreed to work, and that's why we could afford daycare and a new car, but stop it. Well, work didn't work out well. I don't know why you let me do that anyway. What were you thinking? Daycare? It's good for the baby and gives me free time too.

We need to talk...

Don't👏 pretend👏 to 👏be 👏entitled👏 to👏 financial👏 compensation👏 if 👏you 👏or👏 a👏 loved 👏one 👏hasn't👏 even 👏been 👏diagnosed👏 with 👏mesothelioma

i am Goose and let me tell you, being Goose is actually a great thing. we have beautiful people and we have ugly people. just like any race. I for 1 am a great person, have great friends, and i take care of every one that is in my life and i am glad to do it, and for that i have people that love me around me. also, Goose parents are one of the best parents you can have. sometimes they can be really strict, but they will take care of you no matter what, and they will buy you what ever it is that you need. as long as your not a selfish ****head. Also, we all have great jobs, lots of money and a family that we all love and take care off. suck my dick op suck my dick.

Not sure if I love or hate the Misc right now but damn I wanted to use that goose copypasta, it was hilarious

Shut the **** up you ****ing ***got. Geese are the toughest animals you can experience in a city with the only exception being cities in the Arctic Circle where Polar Bears sometimes intrude. And even thennn Geese will often fight the bears away from 'their territory'.

Geese are fighting machines well adapted to life among humans. Think about it - Geese have evolved in canals and public parks. Canals and parks are often the most dangerous places in cities because they are dark at night. People get raped, mugged and killed in parks all the time. When was the last time a Goose was raped and killed in a public park or canal? Never, because Geese are stronger than pretty much any human they encounter.

And yes. Geese wings are like batons. Worse in fact because batons cannot fly away after destroying you and leaving you for dead. Geese can also spread deadly bird rabies as well as other tropical diseases, such as Duckworm, Foje Gras Fever, Feathered Chlamidya, Pond Plague, Tinned Goose Botulism, Whooping Honk and many more. Many people die to these diseases every year because of the birds KNOWING they can kill humans they dislike.

Geese own cities. Pigeons are forced out of Goose habitats because they cannot compete and neither can humans. I'd rather be savaged by a pitbull than a Goose, easily.

OP trynna get his gander on

Is the goose c00ming or laughing?

I just ruined it for you.

Thanks for the 30k reps OP. Oh wait, that was someone else that repped me.

I don't really care about that, but just let me know if that's the correct copypasta I put above.