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Are there any dudes out there that love being a husband and father (srs)
05-23-2023, 02:36 AM
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#1
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Are there any dudes out there that love being a husband and father (srs)
It seems like a mundane life that stops you from progressing with your goals.
- You don't get sleep
- You don't learn anything new
- You spend all your day with your wife moaning about how you didn't change the diapers correctly
- You have concrete attached to your legs for the next 20 years and basically can't go and do anything
- You lose your form and age 10 years in one 1 year
- All your earnings go for the kid and wife, thus leaving you without zero enjoyment
All family dudes I know are really miserable. The pros of being a modern family man are really low compared to the cons. The only way to be happy with a kid and wife is if you decide to buy milk one day, dead srs.
I cannot see myself in that life - maybe feminism is to blame I don't know. I feel like men are not as free-willed as they used to be in their family life.
- You don't get sleep
- You don't learn anything new
- You spend all your day with your wife moaning about how you didn't change the diapers correctly
- You have concrete attached to your legs for the next 20 years and basically can't go and do anything
- You lose your form and age 10 years in one 1 year
- All your earnings go for the kid and wife, thus leaving you without zero enjoyment
All family dudes I know are really miserable. The pros of being a modern family man are really low compared to the cons. The only way to be happy with a kid and wife is if you decide to buy milk one day, dead srs.
I cannot see myself in that life - maybe feminism is to blame I don't know. I feel like men are not as free-willed as they used to be in their family life.
05-23-2023, 02:49 AM
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#2
05-23-2023, 02:55 AM
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#3
- Zenyatta2539
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I've seen examples of people with kids that do manage to make time for enjoyment on the side.
05-23-2023, 03:01 AM
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#4
- phaginator
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Agreed and it's even worse in modern clown world. 50% divorce rates, etc
"Bu his/her smile makes it all worth it bro"...pure cope.
"Bu his/her smile makes it all worth it bro"...pure cope.
05-23-2023, 03:05 AM
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#5
- 7empest
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depends
i'm not a father and i don't even have a GF, but one day I hope to have a family
however, I think (my dumb opinion so who cares) that far too many people do things the wrong way around. they have a family before getting a good life set up, which seems to make it 1000x harder.
and Icertainlywouldn't be having kids if I was in the rat race, working a job I don't like
i'm not a father and i don't even have a GF, but one day I hope to have a family
however, I think (my dumb opinion so who cares) that far too many people do things the wrong way around. they have a family before getting a good life set up, which seems to make it 1000x harder.
and Icertainlywouldn't be having kids if I was in the rat race, working a job I don't like
Overthinking, overanalysing separates the body from the mind
05-23-2023, 03:15 AM
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#6
- IPoopStandingUp
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Staying single is life on easiest mode possible
05-23-2023, 03:24 AM
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#7
05-23-2023, 03:56 AM
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#8
05-23-2023, 04:10 AM
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#9
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I have 5 Kiddos from 12-21 years old. They are not for everyone, but could not imagine happiness without them. Their accomplishments dwarf the happiness that you glean from anything that you did on your own. They drive you nuts sometimes, make you worry like you have never worried before and stress you out when they are in a crisis, but the joy my kids have given me has out paid the sacrifices 100 to 1. I have been with my wife for almost 30 years at this point and could not have done what I did in life without her as a partner. We are a team in life and having someone in your corner all the time is great. You get so many great things from a wife and have to commit to so few things to earn it like not banging other women and being selfish. It is a fair trade if you have a good wife.
Watching my girls grow up to be women and seeing my boys grow into men, real men that work, care about their sisters and mother, enjoy life and don't do tik tok dances is all I will need for the rest of my life to be happy. Your heart grows after having kids but make sure that you and your lady are 100% on the same page, my wife and I always wanted them, if either one of us was wavering even a tiny bit, some of those tough days would have been unbearable.
I just saw my 21 year old son with his 19 year old brother walking down the street and goofing off, putting each other in headlocks and laughing as they went to go to the gym. It was probably one of the happiest moments in my life (SRS).
Watching my girls grow up to be women and seeing my boys grow into men, real men that work, care about their sisters and mother, enjoy life and don't do tik tok dances is all I will need for the rest of my life to be happy. Your heart grows after having kids but make sure that you and your lady are 100% on the same page, my wife and I always wanted them, if either one of us was wavering even a tiny bit, some of those tough days would have been unbearable.
I just saw my 21 year old son with his 19 year old brother walking down the street and goofing off, putting each other in headlocks and laughing as they went to go to the gym. It was probably one of the happiest moments in my life (SRS).
05-23-2023, 04:11 AM
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#10
05-23-2023, 04:14 AM
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#11
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Originally Posted By usera⏩
Lmao, where did I see this g3y ass copy pasta before?I have 5 Kiddos from 12-21 years old. They are not for everyone, but could not imagine happiness without them. Their accomplishments dwarf the happiness that you glean from anything that you did on your own. They drive you nuts sometimes, make you worry like you have never worried before and stress you out when they are in a crisis, but the joy my kids have given me has out paid the sacrifices 100 to 1. I have been with my wife for almost 30 years at this point and could not have done what I did in life without her as a partner. We are a team in life and having someone in your corner all the time is great. You get so many great things from a wife and have to commit to so few things to earn it like not banging other women and being selfish. It is a fair trade if you have a good wife.
Watching my girls grow up to be women and seeing my boys grow into men, real men that work, care about their sisters and mother, enjoy life and don't do tik tok dances is all I will need for the rest of my life to be happy. Your heart grows after having kids but make sure that you and your lady are 100% on the same page, my wife and I always wanted them, if either one of us was wavering even a tiny bit, some of those tough days would have been unbearable.
I just saw my 21 year old son with his 19 year old brother walking down the street and goofing off, putting each other in headlocks and laughing as they went to go to the gym. It was probably one of the happiest moments in my life (SRS).
Watching my girls grow up to be women and seeing my boys grow into men, real men that work, care about their sisters and mother, enjoy life and don't do tik tok dances is all I will need for the rest of my life to be happy. Your heart grows after having kids but make sure that you and your lady are 100% on the same page, my wife and I always wanted them, if either one of us was wavering even a tiny bit, some of those tough days would have been unbearable.
I just saw my 21 year old son with his 19 year old brother walking down the street and goofing off, putting each other in headlocks and laughing as they went to go to the gym. It was probably one of the happiest moments in my life (SRS).
05-23-2023, 04:20 AM
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#12
- Kewbrah
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Being a parent is hard work, including hard. You really have to harden up and grow mentally and emotionally. You have to give up half your previous life.
But it's worth it. You look back on childless life and it seems like kind of a joke. You look back on it the same way you look back on being a little kid playing with toys. You're at a whole different level now.
Being married is meh. Basically tolerable if you choose someone really low maintenance and if you don't take the relationship too seriously.
But it's worth it. You look back on childless life and it seems like kind of a joke. You look back on it the same way you look back on being a little kid playing with toys. You're at a whole different level now.
Being married is meh. Basically tolerable if you choose someone really low maintenance and if you don't take the relationship too seriously.
05-23-2023, 04:29 AM
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#13
- northernlights7
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Originally Posted By IPoopStandingUp⏩
Honestly, I found being married to my ex to be a way bigger pain in the assss for me than having my kid ever was. Married to the right woman, marriage would be great. If they get a sour pissy grass is greener on the other side attitude though, marriage becomes a damn chore real fast imo.Staying single is life on easiest mode possible
05-23-2023, 04:41 AM
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#14
- nothingshocking
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Originally Posted By northernlights7⏩
Wait, you're divorced?Honestly, I found being married to my ex to be a way bigger pain in the assss for me than having my kid ever was. Married to the right woman, marriage would be great. If they get a sour pissy grass is greener on the other side attitude though, marriage becomes a damn chore real fast imo.
05-23-2023, 04:46 AM
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#15
- lightsarefallin
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Seems like a bunch of assumptions being made by someone who has no direct experience with that lifestyle
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05-23-2023, 04:56 AM
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#16
05-23-2023, 05:42 AM
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#17
- yieldtonothing
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i love being a single uncle and i'm positive that at least a couple of my nieces and nephews like me better than their dad
imagine working all day and not sleeping at night and the kids would rather hang with the douchebag wannabe playboy uncle
fuking brutal
imagine working all day and not sleeping at night and the kids would rather hang with the douchebag wannabe playboy uncle
fuking brutal
05-23-2023, 05:48 AM
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#18
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Originally Posted By northernlights7⏩
I kind of don't mind watching over a kid when I think about it. I even feel like it would be easier if there isn't a women around which would constantly moan and put emotional stress all the time. If I don't have to live with an annoying chick who wants to control everything, I guess I would be fine and find the fun in watching a kid.Honestly, I found being married to my ex to be a way bigger pain in the assss for me than having my kid ever was. Married to the right woman, marriage would be great. If they get a sour pissy grass is greener on the other side attitude though, marriage becomes a damn chore real fast imo.
05-23-2023, 05:51 AM
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#19
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Originally Posted By yieldtonothing⏩
Better yet, would be to be the father who doesn't live with the mother. You get to see your kid alone and spend fun once it is your time to hang around.i love being a single uncle and i'm positive that at least a couple of my nieces and nephews like me better than their dad
imagine working all day and not sleeping at night and the kids would rather hang with the douchebag wannabe playboy uncle
fuking brutal
imagine working all day and not sleeping at night and the kids would rather hang with the douchebag wannabe playboy uncle
fuking brutal
I seriously believe that the women in family raletioships worns out a man rather than the kid.
05-23-2023, 05:53 AM
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#20
05-23-2023, 05:54 AM
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#21
- Mundungus
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I have 3 daughters - my 21 year old just graduated college on Saturday and starts law school in the fall and my 13 year old twins are ending their 7th grade year.
Being a dad is awesome but is a huge responsibility and of course it's frustrating at times. The key to good parenting (typically resulting in many positive, rewarding seasons of life) is spending copious amounts of time with your child, especially in the very young formative years. This is crucial to bonding with your child to establish trust, communication, love and set a good example for them. Most people fail here because they refuse to give up some of their own wants/time. A good example are parents that are too busy on their screen so they put a screen in their kid's face to shut them up. These kids grow up with zero attention span, no discipline and feeling ignored/unimportant by/to their parents.
The other major factor in raising respectful, successful children is having an equal to help you instill and demonstrate these values. If your wife isn't on the same page with boundaries, discipline, life view, etc then you're going to struggle. Good parenting starts with a strong marriage that has good communication and reflects the values you are teaching your kids.
Boundaries with Kids is a great book on how to set healthy boundaries for kids. Parenting with Love & Logic is another good one. And for any dads/soon to be dads in here, Authentic Manhood is an excellent series on how to raise sons that grow up to be men and not the weaklings that today's youth are being groomed to become.
Being a dad is awesome but is a huge responsibility and of course it's frustrating at times. The key to good parenting (typically resulting in many positive, rewarding seasons of life) is spending copious amounts of time with your child, especially in the very young formative years. This is crucial to bonding with your child to establish trust, communication, love and set a good example for them. Most people fail here because they refuse to give up some of their own wants/time. A good example are parents that are too busy on their screen so they put a screen in their kid's face to shut them up. These kids grow up with zero attention span, no discipline and feeling ignored/unimportant by/to their parents.
The other major factor in raising respectful, successful children is having an equal to help you instill and demonstrate these values. If your wife isn't on the same page with boundaries, discipline, life view, etc then you're going to struggle. Good parenting starts with a strong marriage that has good communication and reflects the values you are teaching your kids.
Boundaries with Kids is a great book on how to set healthy boundaries for kids. Parenting with Love & Logic is another good one. And for any dads/soon to be dads in here, Authentic Manhood is an excellent series on how to raise sons that grow up to be men and not the weaklings that today's youth are being groomed to become.
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05-23-2023, 05:55 AM
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#22
- Jacobcapra
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Originally Posted By ProSaibot⏩
Idk mate I don't struggle with any of those things. I get 6-7 hours of sleep each night. I have about a half dozen hobbies I actively pursue, and in the last year picked up my first DAW and audio interface and have begun a new hobby in mixing and tracking music, to support my other hobbies of drums and guitar. I go to the gym daily, play video games at night, play golf, and DIY as other hobbies.It seems like a mundane life that stops you from progressing with your goals.
- You don't get sleep
- You don't learn anything new
- You spend all your day with your wife moaning about how you didn't change the diapers correctly
- You have concrete attached to your legs for the next 20 years and basically can't go and do anything
- You lose your form and age 10 years in one 1 year
- All your earnings go for the kid and wife, thus leaving you without zero enjoyment
All family dudes I know are really miserable. The pros of being a modern family man are really low compared to the cons. The only way to be happy with a kid and wife is if you decide to buy milk one day, dead srs.
I cannot see myself in that life - maybe feminism is to blame I don't know. I feel like men are not as free-willed as they used to be in their family life.
- You don't get sleep
- You don't learn anything new
- You spend all your day with your wife moaning about how you didn't change the diapers correctly
- You have concrete attached to your legs for the next 20 years and basically can't go and do anything
- You lose your form and age 10 years in one 1 year
- All your earnings go for the kid and wife, thus leaving you without zero enjoyment
All family dudes I know are really miserable. The pros of being a modern family man are really low compared to the cons. The only way to be happy with a kid and wife is if you decide to buy milk one day, dead srs.
I cannot see myself in that life - maybe feminism is to blame I don't know. I feel like men are not as free-willed as they used to be in their family life.
#3 is a big one and leads to a lot of miserable fathers, because they didn't pick the right wife. My wife is fukking awesome and doesn't really bitch and moan about anything and supports me pursuing all my hobbies and still living my own life despite being a father.
To that end I look better now than I ever did before being a dad. And to your last point, yeah kids are expensive but if you have a good career it's not a big deal. I spend a lot of money on the kids and still have more disposable income than I did when I was younger with no kids.
TLDR - yes if you do it right.
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05-23-2023, 05:55 AM
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#23
- yieldtonothing
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Originally Posted By ProSaibot⏩
you get to be good cop all day errday but oyu run the risk of the mom talking chit about you nonstop and turning the kids against you. women be like that.Better yet, would be to be the father who doesn't live with the mother. You get to see your kid alone and spend fun once it is your time to hang around.
I seriously believe that the women in family raletioships worns out a man rather than the kid.
I seriously believe that the women in family raletioships worns out a man rather than the kid.
05-23-2023, 06:01 AM
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#24
- Samraiwise
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If I were you I'd make the same thread.
But fortunately, I am not you.
But fortunately, I am not you.
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05-23-2023, 06:07 AM
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#25
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It is just raw sacrifice man.
Throw your own identity out of the window.
In order to be good at either of those, you have to completely get over and disregard yourself.
All of your wishes and desires, your own individual identity. It is that serious. Literally who you are a person has to change to be dedicated to this one thing.
They are the most important things in the world and every single second needs to be dedicated to giving them the highest standard of living possible.
There is no boys night out in that equation. Your old drinking friends are gone. That isn’t even a question. Accept that.
Every penny you spend is a penny taken away from your kids, every night you don’t interact with them, bond with them, provide them development and foster your relationships is a detriment to all of your livelihood.
It is a sacrifice and if you don’t understand that, in its entirety, don’t do it.
It provides much more of a sense of purpose though there is not a need for anything else.
Everything else is so superficial and bullchit.
What else is there to do? Make another dollar? Drink another beer? Bang another slut? None of it matters.
At least that is what I envision a good dad being like. I wouldn’t know. I was not taught correctly.
Throw your own identity out of the window.
In order to be good at either of those, you have to completely get over and disregard yourself.
All of your wishes and desires, your own individual identity. It is that serious. Literally who you are a person has to change to be dedicated to this one thing.
They are the most important things in the world and every single second needs to be dedicated to giving them the highest standard of living possible.
There is no boys night out in that equation. Your old drinking friends are gone. That isn’t even a question. Accept that.
Every penny you spend is a penny taken away from your kids, every night you don’t interact with them, bond with them, provide them development and foster your relationships is a detriment to all of your livelihood.
It is a sacrifice and if you don’t understand that, in its entirety, don’t do it.
It provides much more of a sense of purpose though there is not a need for anything else.
Everything else is so superficial and bullchit.
What else is there to do? Make another dollar? Drink another beer? Bang another slut? None of it matters.
At least that is what I envision a good dad being like. I wouldn’t know. I was not taught correctly.
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05-23-2023, 06:08 AM
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#26
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asking this question on a board full of incels will not end well but i'm a dad and husband and love it.
05-23-2023, 06:14 AM
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#27
- Jacobcapra
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Originally Posted By Ironmanlet⏩
I know a lot of people think that way but I disagree. I've never been a 'kids go absolutely first' kind of person. It's always been me, then my wife, then my kids.It is just raw sacrifice man.
Throw your own identity out of the window.
In order to be good at either of those, you have to completely get over and disregard yourself.
All of your wishes and desires, your own individual identity. It is that serious. Literally who you are a person has to change to be dedicated to this one thing.
They are the most important things in the world and every single second needs to be dedicated to giving them the highest standard of living possible.
There is no boys night out in that equation. Your old drinking friends are gone. That isn’t even a question. Accept that.
Every penny you spend is a penny taken away from your kids, every night you don’t interact with them, bond with them, provide them development and foster your relationships is a detriment to all of your livelihood.
It is a sacrifice and if you don’t understand that, in its entirety, don’t do it.
It provides much more of a sense of purpose though there is not a need for anything else.
Everything else is so superficial and bullchit.
What else is there to do? Make another dollar? Drink another beer? Bang another slut? None of it matters.
At least that is what I envision a good dad being like. I wouldn’t know. I was not taught correctly.
Throw your own identity out of the window.
In order to be good at either of those, you have to completely get over and disregard yourself.
All of your wishes and desires, your own individual identity. It is that serious. Literally who you are a person has to change to be dedicated to this one thing.
They are the most important things in the world and every single second needs to be dedicated to giving them the highest standard of living possible.
There is no boys night out in that equation. Your old drinking friends are gone. That isn’t even a question. Accept that.
Every penny you spend is a penny taken away from your kids, every night you don’t interact with them, bond with them, provide them development and foster your relationships is a detriment to all of your livelihood.
It is a sacrifice and if you don’t understand that, in its entirety, don’t do it.
It provides much more of a sense of purpose though there is not a need for anything else.
Everything else is so superficial and bullchit.
What else is there to do? Make another dollar? Drink another beer? Bang another slut? None of it matters.
At least that is what I envision a good dad being like. I wouldn’t know. I was not taught correctly.
I mean, if you don't focus on yourself, you will not be the person you need to be to actually be a good role model. If you don't next focus on your wife, your marriage will suffer, which makes the children suffer. I just dropped my kids of at the grandparents and played a round of golf with my wife this past weekend. It was a blast and I felt zero guilt.
This has worked well for me so far with two kids and another on the way. I'm not solely defined by fatherhood, so I shouldn't act as if I am.
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05-23-2023, 06:14 AM
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#28
- ChinkWithDink
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Dad yes. Husband mostly except when I hate it, women have mental problems and yeah maybe feminism to blame a bit for that one.
What are goals? What use are goals which die when you do?
From your list:
- Got plenty of sleep, wife and I tag teamed it then trained the little ****s early
- Yeah ok, I learn a ****ton about kids, people, my parents, myself
- I am not a beta cuck, this does not happen and if it does she gets a spanking and sucks me off
- Huh? no concrete but yeah, point taken, its harder. But not full on for 20 years, train them up they need to be fully functioning adults by 20, that doesn't magically happen overnight
- Lol some truth to this (bit extreme), doesn't have to be but is hard to fight that one, respect to those who do
- I am not a beta cuck, I look after their needs before mine and then my wants before theirs. I'm not a baller and I'm not a loser, and I don't go around spending money on bull**** to impress other people.
Look it's a bit a of a lottery, get a tard kid and chits gonna be chit, and it's a bit of what you make of it and the wife you choose (all you alphas should have no dramas right?), it has plenty of good and for me I found it is the fundamental form of happiness. But at the same time anyone who thinks it's not for them and they'd rather do something else with their lives, I can respect that, live your life not someone else's
What are goals? What use are goals which die when you do?
From your list:
- Got plenty of sleep, wife and I tag teamed it then trained the little ****s early
- Yeah ok, I learn a ****ton about kids, people, my parents, myself
- I am not a beta cuck, this does not happen and if it does she gets a spanking and sucks me off
- Huh? no concrete but yeah, point taken, its harder. But not full on for 20 years, train them up they need to be fully functioning adults by 20, that doesn't magically happen overnight
- Lol some truth to this (bit extreme), doesn't have to be but is hard to fight that one, respect to those who do
- I am not a beta cuck, I look after their needs before mine and then my wants before theirs. I'm not a baller and I'm not a loser, and I don't go around spending money on bull**** to impress other people.
Look it's a bit a of a lottery, get a tard kid and chits gonna be chit, and it's a bit of what you make of it and the wife you choose (all you alphas should have no dramas right?), it has plenty of good and for me I found it is the fundamental form of happiness. But at the same time anyone who thinks it's not for them and they'd rather do something else with their lives, I can respect that, live your life not someone else's
05-23-2023, 06:18 AM
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#29
Nothing got me more centered and driven than having kids. Brb focused on family and career and the bull**** dissipates.
Yes it takes a ton of work, makes you prioritize things. It’s important to keep your identity and your friends, understanding that they are also grown up and got their own lives going on.
Yes it takes a ton of work, makes you prioritize things. It’s important to keep your identity and your friends, understanding that they are also grown up and got their own lives going on.
☆ Member of the Brave 767 crew ☆ Never forget.
-Florida Gators-
05-23-2023, 06:27 AM
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#30
- Evolutionary1
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- Evolutionary1
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I'm not convinced
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