So me and my boy frequent the gym. You could call us gymrats. We love chasing the pump and throwing up the weight.

We're also what you'd call sociable. Between sets we walk the floor and chop it up with the other bros. Lately, no matter if we come morning, noon, or night, this same dude is there (ratty sweats, beater tucked, socks over pants).

Past few weeks he has been hovering and eavesdropping. No biggie, figured he wanted to jump in with us but when I asked he just Bert stared me.

Yesterday I am walking by the doors of the yoga studio. Lights are out and it is pitch black inside, but I can see myself in the mirrors on the back wall, so I am having a look when this ****ers face appears in the glow of his cellphone. He just fkn stares at me a moment before he starts typing on it.

Wat do?

Shut the fuk up you ******

I wanna play with Muzzlrpress's butthole