you are a complete autist.

You better deliver OP.

You make me feel like Eminem Misc

Just like spoon pics of my BMW, my dad's SL63 AMG, my washing machine and the Five Guys receipt with the girl I recently went on a date with (house party host)...

...I always deliver!

Most situations in my life are nothing to lose:

- Ask a bro in the gym if he's aware; if he bertstares I barely lift anyway

- Ask a girl for her number/drink; if she says no, I'm FA anyway

- Go full alpha Chad in an IB interview; I've had about 20 rejections and found a job in Consultancy already

What division?

PM me if you want some serious advice but don't want to post too many details on the misc.

Been out all day, so will PM later this evening.

Division is Equity Capital Markets. I have previously interned in Capital Markets at DB but it would be very helpful to have any further information about the division, bank, current projects, growth areas, global trends, etc.

Appreciate it brah, have repped in advance

Good luck OP, I have my first round with them on Tuesday.

Sorry brah, don't have much to do with ECM these days.

Should be lots of activity across Europe right now though, particularly in FIG as banks continue to recapitalise. Probably lots of rights issues, which may not be particularly exciting but that's going to be a growth sector for a while yet (especially if you add in fintech). The other big growth area will continue to be tech, for all the obvious reasons. Should be pretty easy for you to find some data on volumes.

Look, I'm assuming that you're not seriously considering any of the suggestions you opened with. I'll also assume that you're bright and have done your research on MS, and can answer all the basic Q's that trip people up (why MS, what do you know about us, tell us about a recent deal, etc). You can also 'fake' some social skills without going full retard. Here's some actual advice.

The single biggest issue I would focus on if I were interviewing you today is that you have now jumped around a bunch of different jobs in a very short space of time. To even consider you for a role I would want to hear a very compelling story of why you have made these moves, what you have achieved / learned, and why that now leads you to a career in ECM. You need to be able to speak passionately about equity markets (or make it up) - you love helping companies grow, love valuations and technical analysis, etc etc.

If you do all that you have a good chance of getting the job.

Opened this thread thinking it was serious, and wasn't going to post until I read this. And it's pretty much this. You're going to need to articulate why MS is different from your past experiences, and link that difference to why you'd be so happy to work there.

I hope that you are well spoken. If I can take anything seriously from your OP I'll guess that you'd really like to get this job. Just understand that any exuberance will look poorly on you. Calm, confident, articulate - with a great emphasis on the 3rd one. You may consider practicing some speaking points and your delivery with a friend if you have time. My advice to you is to pretend you're speaking to an acquaintance - not a close friend but someone you're comfortable speaking to.

Substance and delivery are key here. I hope you have a nice outfit ready (if not - head over to Ozwald Boateng in London - PM me if you want more details).

Good luck.

-so i have to do an interview for morgan stanley
-awkward as ****
-start working out
-not so awkward
-zyzz is my inspiration
-interview again
-trembling
-just keep telling myself "i'm fawkin zeez bruh"
-get confident
-my turn
-i get in there
-start shaking uncontrollably
-start telling myself "i'm fawkin zeez bruh"
-interviewer says I can start anytime
-I start off with "i'm fawkin zeez bruh"
-at this point I'm so nervous I blackout
-"i'm fawkin zeez bruh"
-repeat at least 4 more times
-look around the room, other people on the interview panel are saying "why does he keep saying that?"
-interviewer starts laughing
-I pass out
-hit head on the corner of the desk
-minor concussion
-interviewer thinks I was on drugs
-people at current workplace found out and call my zeezprah
-nickname eventually turns into zebra
-i haven't heard my real name in months
-haven't been this depressed since high school

All the best too!

What division have you applied for? Which city?

lold so hard at this thread, gonna rep OP for a good laugh

why don't you also take out your dink, put it on his desk and tell him to suk it while you're at it ?

If you know 100% your normal interviewing doesn't work, then go for it.

Edit: Though I recommend just being more confident.

Interested in the results. If this works it says more about the banking world than your personality lol!

I know it's trolling and all but jeez, the cringe is real

quantum cringed at the poker bit. Gmiscer has nothing on op.

In on welshautist thread.

Go gettem cowboy

GL Opie

Currently duing an internship there in London

but not IB , business analyst with a CS degree

Number 1 rule of Sales: people buy from people

So if I can impress him with my personable skills, why don't I deserve to be in S&T or M&A or even ECM just as much as someone else?

haven't cringed so hard in a long time

Can your give me an example of being more confident without being 'cringe'?

Worst poster on the misc hands down

The GOAT troll, love the level of detail you go to brah... don't ever change!

Got a call earlier today inviting me to a cocktail party and networking dinner tomorrow evening before the interview on Thursday.

It came out of the blue and they said attendance isn't necessary but they will put me up in a hotel and pay my expenses if I do go.

I am thinking it might be a trap if I don't take up the offer, but either way I was planning on going.

Should I start the alpha Chad game from tomorrow afternoon and continue that momentum into the interview the following day? What do I honestly have to lose?

What universe does she reside in wtf my head

10 week summer internship? How is it? Aware me on culture? Best/worst things about company and people? What hours are you doing? What's the local drinking place? Any initiations/challenges you've had to do?

aw fuk bye. let me be srs. if they are like any other firm they are just looking to see if you aren't a total creep and aren't going to get wasted.

Sounds like a dumb Q, but isn't getting drunk a good thing?

You want to be the fearless, young, alpha, chatty, sociable, alcohol and humour connoisseur, don't you?

It feels like you'd be looked down upon if you stood in a corner sipping orange juice wishing you were at home on League of Legends

says who

old buddy of mine was in finance and got a job in that field

all his office ever did was go out of town and get fukked up on company money.

they want a bro who they can relate with and get along with, not some weirdo that never talks and makes them uncomfortable.

if you don't act like an incel, but not too overly obnoxious(find that nice middle ground of what your op is), you can do it.

firm believer in "fake it til you make it"

GL

Won't take them 40 seconds brahWhy would they extend this invitation to you when you haven't even had the interview, let alone been offered the job? Weird.