Statute of limitations crew

Principle brah sounds like he was just trolling the coach lmfao

plumbers hate himsame fools who gave women the ability to voteeven your fukken origami is some marsupial straya kunt bullchit

Brought a lipstick gag I found in my mom's dresser to show and tell in elementary school. It looked like red lipstick, but once you took the cap off and turned the lip stick knob a tiny dink came out instead of lipstick.

Our high school drafting / architecture teacher was teaching his last year before retirement. He was an alcoholic that had Baileys in his coffee and went out to his truck at lunch to pull a few nips of whiskey everyday. Our class was right after lunch - Somedays he would get wasted and he was mean asf when he was wasted and my buddy had enough of him yelling at us and slurring during class so during lunch he injected superglue into his lock on his classroom door & he wrote "Mr Clark is a fat drunk" on the outside of the door in fat Sharpie.

Mr. Clark didn't want to get anyone in the school administration involved because he was actually drunk when he returned and found he was locked out of his class. So when we were walking down the hallway we could see he was sweating is nuts off literally cutting the handle off of the door and prying the front of the bracket off so that he could manually unlock the door. We asked him what he was doing and he was so exasperated that he couldn't even form a coherent sentence, so we just lold at him. I had 6 really good friends in the class and he knew it was one of us so he called us into his office 1 by 1 trying to get us to rat each other out - we wouldn't so he gave us all detentions for insubordination. We all served it together - still laugh about it till this day. He did manage to keep the alcohol consumption in check for the rest of the year.

I've got a few, LMAO. Such nostalgia.


~ I changed the words in our national anthem from "Our home is gurt by sea" to "Our home is gurt bywee" and a teacher overheard me. Stupid really, every kid does that.

~ I pushed a kid into the urinal trough when he was pissing. Dick thing to do, I deserved that. The kid came back to class reeking of piss as if nothing had happened, lol.

~ I looked over a cubicle when someone was in there taking a chit.

~ The funniest one was when we were in class and I really had to do a huge chit. I tried holding it in but I shifted awkwardly and a turtlehead escaped. I panicked and then another section of log broke loose and beyond the control of my sphincter muscles. Any further effort just served to cut the turd and make the situation worse.

The teacher was in the process of calling someone up in front of the class to read something, and a girl noticed me squirming uncomfortably and said "Hey, how about Bodhy?". I was like "No, you bitch!" and then the teacher called me up. The lump in my pants was hanging down like a distended scrotum and they saw it. My parents were called, and my defiled pants were confiscated and paraded around as a deterrent to any other would-be pants chitters.

In class 2 trouble makers across the room had an orange and they were motioning for me to catch it behind the teacher's back. I went along with it and caught it without the teaching knowing anything.

Then they motioned for me to throw it back to them. I was feeing excited getting into some mischief with the bad guys and I threw it back when the teacher was facing the blackboard - they made no effort to catch it and it SMASHED into the metal locker right behind them.

Teacher ejected me from the class but I suspect they knew what had gone on so nothing more than that.

Had me on the edge of my seat with the last story. Thought your were going to say it fell out of your shorts while walking to the front of the room. Would have been traumatic bruh.

I bet those chit heads are in jail now with antics such as those.

Bunch of us got into trouble because we were putting staples in paper bullets and having wars throughout the day in the hallways.