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When does marriage actually make sense?
03-27-2019, 11:06 AM
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#31
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Originally Posted By ssilv⏩
I guess if you find yourself seriously wanting to raise a child. Seems only logical that the next step would be to find a suitable mother, and set up the best scenario to raise your children.Ok I do agree with most of this. It is also a numbers game and we have to have kids for the survival of our race.
My question still stands though -WHENdoes this make sense? I'm not here to talk about Single vs. Married incomes or how children perceive married parents vs cohabiting parents.
My question still stands though -WHENdoes this make sense? I'm not here to talk about Single vs. Married incomes or how children perceive married parents vs cohabiting parents.
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03-27-2019, 11:20 AM
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#32
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Depends what type of person you are. Some of my friends needed it and want kids. My marriage did make me into a more focused and capable person but that's actually benefited me more now that I'm single again, than when I was married. If you have a common goal and want kids it can work but I wouldn't do it again unless she was rich.
03-27-2019, 11:28 AM
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#33
- backinthegymbro
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Originally Posted By gibbypoo⏩
This. Or to get a passport in a different country etc. But there's no reason to involve the government into your relationship just to declare your love to your SO.When it is economically beneficial
Show her how much you love her every day without being married.
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03-27-2019, 11:28 AM
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#34
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Marriage makes sense in communities like the Amish..
03-27-2019, 11:31 AM
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#35
- ssilv
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Originally Posted By backinthegymbro⏩
this. unless kids are involved its pointless and cuck for a manThis. Or to get a passport in a different country etc. But there's no reason to involve the government into your relationship just to declare your love to your SO.
Show her how much you love her every day without being married.
Show her how much you love her every day without being married.
Originally Posted By Scarrdbutsmartr⏩
they are busy banging their sisters so marriage is not neededMarriage makes sense in communities like the Amish..
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03-27-2019, 11:32 AM
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#36
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When you marry a man
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03-27-2019, 12:13 PM
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#37
- Mumra
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Originally Posted By ssilv⏩
first you need the Reality Stone....what variable determines when it is economically beneficial?
Originally Posted By JUSA⏩
you can't just promise to not break up and leave the gov't out of it? Honestly the only difference is the gov't deciding what happens in the event of a divorce. it's not like being married makes it impossible to split and one person leave the other with the kids. you just need lawyers.As a married man, I would say: Only in the situation in which you are ready and able to start a family. If that's not on the table, you're not ready or unable, then there is absolutely no reason to marry anyone. In my case, were my marriage to end somehow, I would never remarry under any circumstances as I do not want more children.
However, if you bring life into this world, at that moment you have obligations to do your best to ensure they are raised responsibly. Children need a family, a mother and a father, and for that marriage is your only real option.
However, if you bring life into this world, at that moment you have obligations to do your best to ensure they are raised responsibly. Children need a family, a mother and a father, and for that marriage is your only real option.
I would argue that a commitment that is held without a legal contract is stronger since it is kept entirely on it's own.
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03-27-2019, 12:26 PM
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#38
Originally Posted By AltarOfPlagues⏩
you sound like an illiterate incelgibby you are actually consistently retarded, from both your run of the mill "everyone is an incel but me"s to your up your own ass "read a book once in a while"s
03-27-2019, 12:31 PM
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#39
- x420SwagScopex
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Originally Posted By ssilv⏩
A vaginawhat variable determines when it is economically beneficial?
If you have a vagina, marriage is economically beneficial.
If you don’t have a vagina, marriage is not economically beneficial.
/thread
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03-27-2019, 12:39 PM
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#40
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
You can do all that chit without a binding legal contract that allows the woman to run away with half your chit if the marriage doesn’t work out.When you want to start a family and build a home together
When you can look at someone and imagining being old together
When you’re happiest when it’s just you two together, even when you’re just occupying the space
When you can look at someone and imagining being old together
When you’re happiest when it’s just you two together, even when you’re just occupying the space
Every dude who gets raped in a divorce thought him & his wife would be together forever when they got married. Being in love causes people to make very irrational decisions.
Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
I’m speaking generally here. There are exceptions to the rule but generally the man stands to lose more in a divorce than the woman. This can’t really be denied. Marriage in most cases is a bad deal for men, a very risky gamble at best. At worst it is literally “sign here to lose half your chit.”Don’t make me neg you
Like men are the only economic forces in the world in this century, or even in the last
Like men are the only economic forces in the world in this century, or even in the last
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03-27-2019, 12:56 PM
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#41
- Mumra
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family courts are incredibly biased against men. it's not even a point that can be argued.
https://nationalparentsorganization....s-against-dads
just one in the proverbial chit pile of evidence.
I know a woman and man that divorced after 10-ish years. they had 2 kids ages 3 an 10. each parent got a child and she was awarded child support. he had to move in with his parents to afford paying her.
https://nationalparentsorganization....s-against-dads
just one in the proverbial chit pile of evidence.
I know a woman and man that divorced after 10-ish years. they had 2 kids ages 3 an 10. each parent got a child and she was awarded child support. he had to move in with his parents to afford paying her.
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03-27-2019, 12:58 PM
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#42
03-27-2019, 12:58 PM
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#43
- x420SwagScopex
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
You wouldn’t have been able to commit yourself to someone without a legal contract?Only some people, me fr’instance, would not have started a family without being married, I would not have reached that level of commitment and would have backed away
Because marriage is important to me
Because marriage is important to me
What if you still had the wedding? Still made vows to each other and lived together and had kids? Still called each other husband and wife? Only thing you didn’t do was sign on the dotted line.
The marriage certificate is the least important part of a happy marriage. Aside from tax cuts and a few other legal situations, it only really becomes relevant when the marriage ends, and in that situation the man gets screwed. GENERALLY.
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03-27-2019, 01:10 PM
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#44
03-27-2019, 01:12 PM
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#45
- colbski
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Originally Posted By x420SwagScopex⏩
We never got this tax benefit thing because we never see a refund. We always have to pay the feds!!! Is it because I claim 0 on the exemptions and she claims 1???You wouldn’t have been able to commit yourself to someone without a legal contract?
What if you still had the wedding? Still made vows to each other and lived together and had kids? Still called each other husband and wife? Only thing you didn’t do was sign on the dotted line.
The marriage certificate is the least important part of a happy marriage. Aside from tax cuts and a few other legal situations, it only really becomes relevant when the marriage ends, and in that situation the man gets screwed. GENERALLY.
What if you still had the wedding? Still made vows to each other and lived together and had kids? Still called each other husband and wife? Only thing you didn’t do was sign on the dotted line.
The marriage certificate is the least important part of a happy marriage. Aside from tax cuts and a few other legal situations, it only really becomes relevant when the marriage ends, and in that situation the man gets screwed. GENERALLY.
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03-27-2019, 01:13 PM
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#46
03-27-2019, 01:16 PM
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#47
- dannyg1217
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When you want kids, IMO
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03-27-2019, 01:34 PM
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#48
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
This is the way women think though, it's like outside the family authority based. Lots of women like religion for that reason "Father Smith will marry us" as if Father Smith is real when he's not.Shallow shadow of a traditional coupling
We are legally a family, we share our names and lives.
The kind of person who imagines that bond is breakable so won’t marry is not the kind of person I would have wholly commited to
If you enter into a relationship imagining there’s an end then what’s the point?
We are legally a family, we share our names and lives.
The kind of person who imagines that bond is breakable so won’t marry is not the kind of person I would have wholly commited to
If you enter into a relationship imagining there’s an end then what’s the point?
Lots of women like rules, authority figures, etc. It's on the lower end of Kohlberg's idea about moral development.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawren...al_development
The legalities, names, etc aren't real. Some of it is nice, but it's not real. The only real thing in a relationship is what people think and do.
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03-27-2019, 01:34 PM
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#49
- x420SwagScopex
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
If you know you’re gonna die one day then what’s the point of living? If we lived forever our lives would be meaningless.If you enter into a relationship imagining there’s an end then what’s the point?
If there was no possibility of your marriage ending or turning to chit then you would have no motivation to keep working on it. There’s nothing special about a successful marriage if failure was never a possibility. The bond is breakable whether you admit it or not, and that’s actually a good thing.
But for every relationship that ends happily ever after there’s 50 that crash and burn. Half of all marriages end in divorce and a good portion of the ones that stay together are miserable. The odds are against you. Nobody goes into a relationship expecting that to happen, but it happens nonetheless. It’s not a good idea to sign a contract that will screw you over in the case that it does. Especially when you can still have all the most important parts of a marriage without the contract.
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03-27-2019, 01:35 PM
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#50
- EnderG60
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3 reasons I did it.
1. I want kids and a stable environment for them. (the logical reason)
2. I actually love her. (the irrational reason)
3. She makes more than me, so on the off chance she fuks up I get paid for it. (the insurance)
1. I want kids and a stable environment for them. (the logical reason)
2. I actually love her. (the irrational reason)
3. She makes more than me, so on the off chance she fuks up I get paid for it. (the insurance)
03-27-2019, 01:50 PM
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#51
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Handcuffing yourself to one woman for the rest of your life only makes sense if you are going to have children with her.
03-27-2019, 01:50 PM
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#52
03-27-2019, 01:53 PM
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#53
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Originally Posted By colbski⏩
They got married because "it was time", hoping it would fix the relationship and it never does. Ive watched that happen to 3 friends, they are all now divorced.I knew a couple that dated for 8 years. They got married and within 5 months, they got a divorce. It's so strange to me.
People just dont know when to walk away....Same as having a kid to save the marriage, and still getting divorced but now with a 1 year old.
03-27-2019, 01:56 PM
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#54
03-27-2019, 01:57 PM
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#55
03-27-2019, 01:58 PM
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#56
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religious reasons or financial benefits
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03-27-2019, 02:04 PM
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#57
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
That's what I've been saying though.I disagree, the concept of commitment is not about a “higher or external authority”
It’s about faith in your coupling
It’s about faith in your coupling
You didn't say that.
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03-27-2019, 02:18 PM
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#58
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We got married even though we are not having kids.
Neither of us owned anything of value when we started dating, no house etc.
I out-earn him, only by a little but his pension scheme is a bit better, so we are more or less even. Maybe would have thought twice aout marriage if I vastly out-earned my partner.
Neither of us will be giving up careers etc for child rearing so even if the worst was to happen, he won’t get robbed in court. We will probably just split 50/50 and that would be basically what we both put in anyways.
Now we are married though, we are automatically each others next of kin, we get to make the hard decisons on our lives or deaths, organ donation, palliative care etc, however grim that sounds. We would receive a large portion of each others pension should one of us not make it to pension age.
We also get control of each others finances in case of bad mental illness or death.
For instance, I would trust him to make the right decision if I was a vegetable, would not trust my family to let me go peacefully and vice versa.
We hot to have a beautiful wedding day with memories and ohotos that I honestly cherish.
Plus when we fist bump, our rings clink and that is just lovely.
Neither of us owned anything of value when we started dating, no house etc.
I out-earn him, only by a little but his pension scheme is a bit better, so we are more or less even. Maybe would have thought twice aout marriage if I vastly out-earned my partner.
Neither of us will be giving up careers etc for child rearing so even if the worst was to happen, he won’t get robbed in court. We will probably just split 50/50 and that would be basically what we both put in anyways.
Now we are married though, we are automatically each others next of kin, we get to make the hard decisons on our lives or deaths, organ donation, palliative care etc, however grim that sounds. We would receive a large portion of each others pension should one of us not make it to pension age.
We also get control of each others finances in case of bad mental illness or death.
For instance, I would trust him to make the right decision if I was a vegetable, would not trust my family to let me go peacefully and vice versa.
We hot to have a beautiful wedding day with memories and ohotos that I honestly cherish.
Plus when we fist bump, our rings clink and that is just lovely.
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03-27-2019, 02:27 PM
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#59
- AltarOfPlagues
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03-27-2019, 02:30 PM
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#60
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Originally Posted By Rabbitjb⏩
Wow...Yeah I did, but commitment to me included marriage. A public, traditional and legally binding union that says this man and woman belong to each other
You seemed to imply that the marriage is the higher authority that confers commitment, I’m saying it’s the visual, public proof of that commitment
And I don’t care how other people choose to live, and whether they choose to marry or not.
But the question posed demands perspectives and that’s mine
You seemed to imply that the marriage is the higher authority that confers commitment, I’m saying it’s the visual, public proof of that commitment
And I don’t care how other people choose to live, and whether they choose to marry or not.
But the question posed demands perspectives and that’s mine
Read the Kohlberg link.
If you want to ask me a question:
Ask: TheAdlerian
http://forum.obnoxiousbrutes.com/showthread.php?t=150655983&p=1000366043#post1000366043
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