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Forum » My younger brother is im the ICU after eso****eal varices and alcohol withdrawals
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Thread: My younger brother is im the ICU after eso****eal varices and alcohol withdrawals

post 1628261313 01-11-2021, 02:17 PM
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Originally Posted By Jestbrah⏩
I wouldnt be doing chit. Serious.

Most of what you would be doing without gaining some knowledge first is enabling him.

My mom is an alcoholic(in recovery) and did some dumb **** multiple times, I never dropped a thing to go visit her. That was her choice to put herself there and I wasnt going to let her get the ability of having me feel sorry for her for a second or effecting my life. It just enables them in so many ways to keep doing what they do. They need to learn to become RESPONSIBLE for their own actions and emotions. It isnt your job. Their behavior negatively impacting your life is like a hard on for addicts. Gives them so much more reason to keep doing what they do.

Notice how I said she is now in recovery and has been for over half a decade now.
Yep, I had to learn to became very comfortable with "Oh no, I hope you figure out a way to get yourself out of that trouble." Click.

Great to hear about your mother.
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post 1628261333 01-11-2021, 02:17 PM
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Originally Posted By HYDRAE⏩
I'm going to guess he was drinking waaaaaay more than you knew.Alcoholics are very good at covering their drinking. Cirrhosis is notorious for not showing symptoms until it is too late.
Probably, but some people are also just genetically unlucky. Some people can abuse the hell out of alcohol for decades without any real major health issues, then you have other people whose bodies can break down after a few years of it.
post 1628261373 01-11-2021, 02:18 PM
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Originally Posted By Jestbrah⏩
I wouldnt be doing chit. Serious.

Most of what you would be doing without gaining some knowledge first is enabling him.

My mom is an alcoholic(in recovery) and did some dumb **** multiple times, I never dropped a thing to go visit her. That was her choice to put herself there and I wasnt going to let her get the ability of having me feel sorry for her for a second or effecting my life. It just enables them in so many ways to keep doing what they do. They need to learn to become RESPONSIBLE for their own actions and emotions. It isnt your job. Their behavior negatively impacting your life is like a hard on for addicts. Gives them so much more reason to keep doing what they do.

Notice how I said she is now in recovery and has been for over half a decade now.
I definitely get that but I think its less addiction and more him not knowing better and thinking he is invincible.

Our dad drinks like a fish and has for years and has no health problems. He recently decreased to only drinking weekends with no issues. Our grandfather used to make moonshine in radiators.

I can bet this is the stupid **** he told himself to make it seem okay
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post 1628261873 01-11-2021, 02:22 PM
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hopefully he takes this as a very serious wake up call that he needs to stop doing what he's doing
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post 1628263273 01-11-2021, 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted By drFEEL⏩
I definitely get that but I think its less addiction and more him not knowing better and thinking he is invincible.

Our dad drinks like a fish and has for years and has no health problems. He recently decreased to only drinking weekends with no issues. Our grandfather used to make moonshine in radiators.

I can bet this is the stupid **** he told himself to make it seem okay
this is exactly why I said you need more knowledge or you are just going to be enabling him in a very bad way.

If he was 20/21, sure this may be a possibility but still a major warning sign of alcoholism.

But come on man, 29 years old and has multiple severe health conditions from drinking? this isnt done by just being one of the boys and not having a serious drinking problem.

The thinking of "alcoholism is something you can just control through a wake up call and an "ah hah" moment" is 100% false. Also the idea of someone who is an alcoholic not ACTUALLY being an alcoholic just borderline, is false, unless like I said its a 20 year old in college being a dumbass and even then its worrisome.
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post 1628265453 01-11-2021, 02:58 PM
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That’s what end stage alcoholism looks like. Dude wrecked himself sorry bro. It may be too late for him to live a normal life. Also his alcoholism is 100x worse than you know. You have to drink incredible amounts to get to that stage by 29... like a TON.
post 1628270033 01-11-2021, 03:40 PM
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Originally Posted By drFEEL⏩
Hes 29 which is what doesn’t make sense to me and what angers me so much.

Eso****eal varices is a late finding of cirrhosis as far as i know and he had no other symptoms. How the **** does that happen???

He isn’t a text book addict either. He has quit cold turkey with no problem but goes back in times of stress.

The worst part is I know him. I lf he had any worry signs he would have quit asap
how long your body holds out is largely genetic. some people will die at 30 from heavy drinking for a few years, other people drink every day until they're 70 before their **** gives in.
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post 1628273923 01-11-2021, 04:19 PM
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post 1628274353 01-11-2021, 04:24 PM
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post 1628274983 01-11-2021, 04:31 PM
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post 1628281543 01-11-2021, 05:36 PM
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Someone read my edit and tell me how not to be dumb
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post 1628281893 01-11-2021, 05:39 PM
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Originally Posted By drFEEL⏩
Someone read my edit and tell me how not to be dumb
I really don't know the right answer but if you're making a misc thread, it sounds like you need to get it out or it'll eat away at you

Is there any one you can talk to about it? A best friend?
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post 1628284183 01-11-2021, 06:03 PM
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Originally Posted By xeron⏩
I really don't know the right answer but if you're making a misc thread, it sounds like you need to get it out or it'll eat away at you

Is there any one you can talk to about it? A best friend?
Ya im sure no one wants to hear this $hit
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post 1628285053 01-11-2021, 06:10 PM
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Originally Posted By Silencespeaks⏩
Yep can confirm my ex covered up the extent of his drinking. I knew he was a heavy drinker but it was WAY worse than I knew. They lie to cover it up.
Same with my mother. When we searched the house after my sister found her passed out for the first time we found two duffel bags full of empty vodka bottles. They were stashed everywhere. Drawers under stuff, boots in the closet, behind pipes, etc. She had stashes all over the house and nobody had any idea.
post 1628299483 01-11-2021, 08:15 PM
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Originally Posted By drFEEL⏩
And here I am on the other side of the country at work not skipping a beat because that’s what’s expected of me.

Mind is racing dunno how to respond to this.

None of it makes any sense to me.

No more relaxing drinks with my bro when i go visit even if he makes it through.

EDIT: I actually don’t know how to deal with something like this. Do i tell people or keep it all bottled up until i spaz out.

Im socially awkward as **** with this stuff
talk to someone bud. I lost my brother 3 years ago to liver failure. I hope he pulls through and gets the help he needs.
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post 1628301353 01-11-2021, 08:32 PM
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Originally Posted By LargePeter⏩
OP posts about brother being in a world of hurt

Silencespeaks steers the thread toward her with 7 posts in the thread. OP only has 5.

Seriously, fuk off you attention whore pest.
Lol this. I see this dumb sloot de-railing threads all the time, speak to a close friend OP or call up one of your family members to talk about the situation. Other than that stay calm and think about what you can do to help your brother/family during this tough time, i'll keep your brother in my thoughts brah.
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