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Forum » Gf VERY upset I’m not going to a wedding with her
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Thread: Gf VERY upset I’m not going to a wedding with her

post 1663690673 06-30-2022, 01:25 PM
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Originally Posted By Ratfish⏩
i hope mamasan catches the bouquet, you glorious winged 5'1" phgt
Looooool
post 1663690703 06-30-2022, 01:25 PM
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#212
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Lmao, its simple, you simply dont give a fuk about your gf. Its over. Its not about how much of a lazy pu--y you are, its the fact you simply dont care enough about her. IF shes a good girl, I feel bad for her. Going to a wedding by herself is bad enough, but her best friend? lmao I hope she cheats on you dead fukkin srs, but doubt you would care at all. LMAO.
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post 1663690813 06-30-2022, 01:28 PM
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Originally Posted By Ratfish⏩
i hope mamasan catches the bouquet, you glorious winged 5'1" phgt
Lmfao
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post 1663690833 06-30-2022, 01:28 PM
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Op is your dick really 2.5 ?

If so brother….. you best apologize
post 1663690843 06-30-2022, 01:29 PM
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Update: apologized and STILL not going (ded fkn Srs)


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post 1663691183 06-30-2022, 01:34 PM
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hmm on one hand I get that it's a big hassle to fly all the way across the country to spend a whole weekend with some people you barely know, on the other hand it might be nice to go with your girl so she can have a good time while also having you there with her to share the moment with

plus it'll be next weekend before you know it, time flies especially during summer, it also gives you a nice card to play when you wanna have a weekend off alone or with the bros sometime later this summer
post 1663691223 06-30-2022, 01:35 PM
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Weddings are such a fuking slag, and being across the country makes it 10x worse.

However, especially since she’s paying for everything, this is one of those situations where you have to bite the bullet and sacrifice your personal time and comfort for the sake of your significant other.

Also you will probably look like a huge whiny ******* to all her family and friends if you leave her to go alone. You can say you don’t care about that but her opinion of you will change if everybody else she knows has zero respect for you and thinks you’re a loser.
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post 1663691253 06-30-2022, 01:35 PM
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
Frankly I made the comment to her about the money because if we are together long term, me setting a precedent by dropping 2-3k on a 48 hour trip to Seattle for a person I’ve never met doesn’t bode well for future expectations re: frivolous spending

I have saved a lot of money because I avoid **** like this, whereas I know many people that make 250k a year and spend it all, living paycheck to paycheck


Anyway boyos, I can’t quote and respond to each and every one of you. The overwhelming response has been that I dun goofed, which is probably accurate.


I understand that i approached this is a very selfish, self centered way.


I give this chick a lot of my time, treat her well, spend a good bit of money on activities, travel with her etc.

I put my foot down on this one because I just truly did not want to go.

If she decides to cheat on me because of it, then I guess I asked for it — but it also illuminates the fact that she’s not a quality woman anyway (and perhaps highlights that I’m too selfish for her — but it’s one ****ing wedding, give me a break)


In my eyes - if this wedding is make or break, that’s ****ing pathetic Peter

(ded fkn Srs)
There's a difference between being alpha and selfish; I believe you're being the latter in this situation.

If you had big or important plans for that weekend, I can understand the hesitancy to go, but with your self-described lazy tendencies, I'm guessing that's not the case. It can be nice to have a weekend to yourself to rest, but I personally think deepening a relationship with a girl you love would be more important.

Relationships are a two-way street. As everyone else is saying, she WILL remember this. You just have to be ready for the consequences when she decides your debt is due if you decide not to go.
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post 1663691573 06-30-2022, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted By DustinTheHuss⏩
Yeah but for $2,000?! I’ve been a bridesmaid in several weddings and you’re paired up with a groomsman so you’re busy with him. Your SO is either another groomsman or sitting in the corner getting drunk alone.

As I stated I was just fine attending a wedding alone as a bridesmaid but I’m an only child and very independent.

Gosh people go psycho over weddings and they’re honestly a joke of an expense ($50,000 and higher). I’m glad I’m not a younger man trying to finance a wedding if the bride’s parents can’t.
If he was paying his own way, the $2,000 would be enough of an argument to get him out of going. If his gf is gonna pay, then he doesn't really have a reason other than personal/selfish reasons.

I do agree $2,000 seems ridiculous for a wedding. But if it's for her best friend, and she's willing to pay...

Also agreed that people go psycho about them. I hate them personally, so only go to family or very close friends wedding. Best believe that if I'm going to a wedding, and offered to pay for my SO, and she still didn't want to go, we'd be having an issue.

OP we're gonna need more details, what did she do to not handle it well? Sounds like there's more to this story.
"So t
post 1663691653 06-30-2022, 01:43 PM
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I don’t think she’s the vindictive type boyos (ded fkn Srs)


In the past 9 months we’ve traveled to Denver, Dallas, San Francisco together to visit her friends (ded fkn Srs)


I’ve easily spent ~10k this year on eating out with her by itself, let alone gifts and experiences etc (court side NBA, fine dining **** in NYC, baseball games, museums etc etc etc )


So I am not scared that she thinks I’m cheap. She knows I make good money, this ain’t some dick measuring contest for me. I just straight up did not want to go LOL

(ded fkn Srs)


I realize that is selfish and immature — hopefully this isn’t the end boyos
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post 1663691753 06-30-2022, 01:44 PM
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[QUOTE=RealLifeAlpha post_id=1663690843]Update: apologized and STILL not going (ded fkn Srs)


[URL=https://ibb.co/gz9NJBW][img]https://i.ibb.co/QrQLM1H/ACDFCFEA-7-FE2-4943-BAB2-82-D066-D1-CEAF.jpg[/mg][/URL][/QUOTE]"I think we're both doing the right things though"

As someone who has lots of experience with women, that's the passive aggressive part that means she's already started to entertain the idea of finding someone else. She's convincing herself that beginning to distance herself from you emotionally and going single and seeing herself as single is the right move for her at this time.
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post 1663692053 06-30-2022, 01:48 PM
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#222
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Originally Posted By Zackad⏩
OP we're gonna need more details, what did she do to not handle it well? Sounds like there's more to this story.
On mobile so might miss some details but



A month or ~6 weeks ago, she was sort of like “ok fine, you don’t have to go, but will you go to XYZ’s wedding in Los Angeles in October?” — knowing that I had met XYZ before.

I agreed, and said ok I will go to the wedding in October then.


Fast forward to two weeks ago, she starts getting pouty about the July wedding in Seattle, and she’s like “well what if I paid”

I was like lol no, not necessary, just go and we’ll make it up to your friend another time and visit her next year or some ****


It’s gotten progressively worse, to the point where she cries every time the subject comes up, and she has straight up been nagging me about it and asking if I even love her as a result (ded fkn Srs)


I didn’t appreciate her switching up on me a month after saying “ok, you don’t have to go”

I could’ve handled it better and should’ve just said “fine, I’ll go” once her tune changed, but I got hung up on the annoying flip flopping, lack of logic, etc
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post 1663692163 06-30-2022, 01:50 PM
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#223
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Originally Posted By Coal
"I think we're both doing the right things though"

As someone who has lots of experience with women, that's the passive aggressive part that means she's already started to entertain the idea of finding someone else. She's convincing herself that beginning to distance herself from you emotionally and going single and seeing herself as single is the right move for her at this time.
At the expense of sounding like a cuck, I really would be surprised if she did that


I’m her 2nd bf, 2nd cock, she has loved this very sheltered life.

The first time I banged her doggy, she was like “where did you learn that?” (ded fkn Srs)

She made me wait 3 months before hitting


All of that to say — I know all women are capable of cheating, and even this one. I can’t deny that.

I would be very surprised if it happened though, but I’m not naive enough to think it isn’t a possibility (ded fkn Srs)
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post 1663692483 06-30-2022, 01:56 PM
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#224
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
On mobile so might miss some details but



A month or ~6 weeks ago, she was sort of like “ok fine, you don’t have to go, but will you go to XYZ’s wedding in Los Angeles in October?” — knowing that I had met XYZ before.

I agreed, and said ok I will go to the wedding in October then.


Fast forward to two weeks ago, she starts getting pouty about the July wedding in Seattle, and she’s like “well what if I paid”

I was like lol no, not necessary, just go and we’ll make it up to your friend another time and visit her next year or some ****


It’s gotten progressively worse, to the point where she cries every time the subject comes up, and she has straight up been nagging me about it and asking if I even love her as a result (ded fkn Srs)


I didn’t appreciate her switching up on me a month after saying “ok, you don’t have to go”

I could’ve handled it better and should’ve just said “fine, I’ll go” once her tune changed, but I got hung up on the annoying flip flopping, lack of logic, etc
Try to look at it from her perspective. You admitted you've spent nearly $10k on frivolous spending (expensive dinners, courtside basketball seats, etc.) but now you won't go to a wedding that's important to her which she's willing to pay your way. Obviously she knows money isn't the issue...which leaves her to wonder what is.

I'm in full agreement with Coal Man that her statement is vague and implicative that she's readjusting her perspective. Take it from someone who's made the same mistakes you have multiple times.

Obviously her flip-flopping is annoying, and she probably could have done a better job about being more direct about how important it was that you go with her. But as the man in the relationship, you have to be able to sift through the BS and read between the lines. If she's asking if you even love her as a result, then it's definitely a significant thing to her.

I don't think she's gonna cheat on you at the wedding. But I do think she's gonna start emotionally distancing and it will lead to the eventual demise of the relationship.
"So t
post 1663692573 06-30-2022, 01:59 PM
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How much do you like this chick man? If you don’t like her enough to travel to see her and at least meet her in person then you need to find a girl that lives closer bud. I see your point though, it’s just one event, a friends wedding, if she’s that upset about this then how upset is she going to be about everything else in your lives together?
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post 1663692603 06-30-2022, 01:59 PM
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So what you got going on that weekend that you can't enjoy a free weekend in Seattle? Still can't admit the real reason?

Weddings are obv a big deal to most women, even their friends' weddings. If you don't go she's going to not help but resent you for it. You'll figure out if it's worth it at a later point in time, because she's not gonna let you forget it.

It's not even about the wedding anymore. She and everyone else on the misc doesn't understand why you wouldn't go. When you can't articulate a reason why, it just screams immaturity.
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post 1663692653 06-30-2022, 02:00 PM
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Originally Posted By Zackad⏩
Try to look at it from her perspective. You admitted you've spent nearly $10k on frivolous spending (expensive dinners, courtside basketball seats, etc.) but now you won't go to a wedding that's important to her which she's willing to pay your way.

I'm in full agreement with Coal Man that her statement is vague and implicative that she's readjusting her perspective. Take it from someone who's made the same mistakes you have multiple times.

Obviously her flip-flopping is annoying, and she probably could have done a better job about being more direct about how important it was that you go with her. But as the man in the relationship, you have to be able to sift through the BS and read between the lines. If she's asking if you even love her as a result, then it's definitely a significant thing to her.

I don't think she's gonna cheat on you at the wedding. But I do think she's gonna start emotionally distancing and it will lead to the eventual demise of the relationship.
I don’t disagree completely - but if she decides to distance herself bc I botched how I handled one wedding, then fukkit she ain’t it (ded fkn Srs)
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post 1663692853 06-30-2022, 02:04 PM
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#228
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Originally Posted By _zman⏩
So what you got going on that weekend that you can't enjoy a free weekend in Seattle? Still can't admit the real reason?
Nothing at all lol

I just got back from a trip to Denver with her a few weeks ago, have been traveling for work and customers a lot, have had weddings recently that she could not make due to work / being a little tired etc, which I said that’s fine I don’t mind if you don’t come.

A week later we’re going on a vacation with my extended family in the Caribbean

None of this is the reason I’m not going


It’s just that …. Ya know, I don’t wanna go (ded fkn Srs)
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post 1663693073 06-30-2022, 02:08 PM
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
It’s just that …. Ya know, I don’t wanna go (ded fkn Srs)
Don't let any of these simps guilt trip you, king.
post 1663693213 06-30-2022, 02:09 PM
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#230
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Originally Posted By Polaris⏩
Don't let any of these simps guilt trip you, king.
Lmao on rc but also probably on spread kang (ded fkn Srs)
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post 1663693233 06-30-2022, 02:09 PM
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#231
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
I don’t disagree completely - but if she decides to distance herself bc I botched how I handled one wedding, then fukkit she ain’t it (ded fkn Srs)
it's not so much the specific wedding debacle that will make her distance herself, but the sum of all the parts that make her believe how you would handle yourself in the future. And since this isn't the sort of thing you can go back and correct, it will always eat at her.

Sure, some girls it wouldn't faze them, or they would handle it better. But you have to worry about this girl. Assuming you want any sort of longevity with her. Chit, my ex broke up with me in part because I invited a couple friends on a camping trip with us, when she wanted it to be just the two of us, and took that to mean that I was prioritizing my friends over her. Not the case, but that's how she understood it.
"So t
post 1663693483 06-30-2022, 02:13 PM
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#232
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Originally Posted By Zackad⏩
it's not so much the specific wedding debacle that will make her distance herself, but the sum of all the parts that make her believe how you would handle yourself in the future. And since this isn't the sort of thing you can go back and correct, it will always eat at her.

Sure, some girls it wouldn't faze them, or they would handle it better. But you have to worry about this girl. Assuming you want any sort of longevity with her. Chit, my ex broke up with me in part because I invited a couple friends on a camping trip with us, when she wanted it to be just the two of us, and took that to mean that I was prioritizing my friends over her. Not the case, but that's how she understood it.
I hear you dude - and if the circumstances were different, I’d go


I feel like the last year+, I’ve put in a lot of time, effort, money, etc, so I thought “fukkit I am gonna be a little selfish on this one”


I feel like In your situation, you dodged a bullet, no?

I feel like it this is curtains for me, I dodged one too (ded fkn Srs)
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post 1663693853 06-30-2022, 02:19 PM
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#233
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Originally Posted By Zackad⏩
Try to look at it from her perspective. You admitted you've spent nearly $10k on frivolous spending (expensive dinners, courtside basketball seats, etc.) but now you won't go to a wedding that's important to her which she's willing to pay your way. Obviously she knows money isn't the issue...which leaves her to wonder what is.

I'm in full agreement with Coal Man that her statement is vague and implicative that she's readjusting her perspective. Take it from someone who's made the same mistakes you have multiple times.

Obviously her flip-flopping is annoying, and she probably could have done a better job about being more direct about how important it was that you go with her. But as the man in the relationship, you have to be able to sift through the BS and read between the lines. If she's asking if you even love her as a result, then it's definitely a significant thing to her.

I don't think she's gonna cheat on you at the wedding. But I do think she's gonna start emotionally distancing and it will lead to the eventual demise of the relationship.
This


Op you might have just destroyed the best thing you have. Just go brother.
post 1663694153 06-30-2022, 02:23 PM
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#234
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
I don’t disagree completely - but if she decides to distance herself bc I botched how I handled one wedding, then fukkit she ain’t it (ded fkn Srs)
I respect you standing your ground but hopefully this isnt the hill you need to die on if this happens to be the last straw in the relationship but you seem to be okay with it if this is the last straw anyways so fuk it?
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post 1663694273 06-30-2022, 02:25 PM
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#235
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
At the expense of sounding like a cuck, I really would be surprised if she did that


I’m her 2nd bf, 2nd cock, she has loved this very sheltered life.

The first time I banged her doggy, she was like “where did you learn that?” (ded fkn Srs)

She made me wait 3 months before hitting


All of that to say — I know all women are capable of cheating, and even this one. I can’t deny that.

I would be very surprised if it happened though, but I’m not naive enough to think it isn’t a possibility (ded fkn Srs)
I get you man. And I get all of this but if it's one thing I've learned is to never underestimate a woman's ability to just turn that switch off and stop caring about you. As a man we just can't understand it as well but they're built different.

For example you make her seem like she's a really reserved, logical girl who has pair bonded with you. But then you admit she does this:
Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
Fast forward to two weeks ago, she starts getting pouty about the July wedding in Seattle, and she’s like “well what if I paid”

It’s gotten progressively worse, to the point where she cries every time the subject comes up, and she has straight up been nagging me about it and asking if I even love her as a result (ded fkn Srs)


I didn’t appreciate her switching up on me a month after saying “ok, you don’t have to go”

but I got hung up on the annoying flip flopping, lack of logic, etc
I cannot fathom as a guy being this way but women are just emotional as fuk man. If my girl was acting this way but I know she's usually more logical then that's a big indication of how huge of a deal this is for her.
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post 1663694293 06-30-2022, 02:25 PM
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#236
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im not going to read 8 pages but if you want my advice yes you are being a **** if she is paying, if not then fuk now thats a lot of money for something you dont care about
**worthless college major crew**

*Always picks 4 Crew*

**HTC**
post 1663694433 06-30-2022, 02:28 PM
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#237
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People do some dumb chit for a wedding


Probably will be divorced within 3-5 years then after all the money they spent and the retards spending $2k to come join in on a 5 hour overpriced party will feel real dumb
post 1663695633 06-30-2022, 02:54 PM
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#238
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Seeing her best friend get married will not bother her. Her texts indicate this
post 1663695763 06-30-2022, 02:58 PM
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#239
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Originally Posted By RealLifeAlpha⏩
I hear you dude - and if the circumstances were different, I’d go


I feel like the last year+, I’ve put in a lot of time, effort, money, etc, so I thought “fukkit I am gonna be a little selfish on this one”


I feel like In your situation, you dodged a bullet, no?

I feel like it this is curtains for me, I dodged one too (ded fkn Srs)
In my situation, most likely yes. In yours, only you can determine that. If the compromise she's asking isn't one you're willing to make, then yes. Just know that if you find any girl worth keeping, you're gonna have to step up at times you don't want to and eat chit. Just the name of the game.
"So t
post 1663697013 06-30-2022, 03:33 PM
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#240
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How is this thread 9 pages long. Cliffs?

Also, OP should go.
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.
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