99% sure my ex has covert NPD and this was exactly it. Other than treating me and her own mom like total chit behind closed doors, outward appearances were that she was great. Coupled with her manipulating the narrative with her/our friends and co-workers to make me sound like a piece of chit, it's no wonder those people act like I'm the idiot for splitting with her (although I'm pretty sure her mom understands why I had to).

You have narcissistic tendencies which can point to BPD

Logged on to say this. I have a kid with my now ex-wife who is BPD. It's not great, and yes she's a severe case. False domestic abuse accusations, property damage, suicide attempts, etc. It's pretty much hell.

To the guy who is dating BPD women and knowingly messing with their heads by dumping them whenever they have episodes....you might want to take a hard look at yourself. There's an argument to be made for allowing natural consequences to happen to BPD women so they can learn and evolve and get better, but once you are fully aware of their condition and you keep stringing them along....you've become the problem. If you have the ability to do the right thing, you have the RESPONSIBILITY to do the right thing. These poor women suffered badly during adolescence, and this behavior is mostly out of their control. Think of it like autism or downs syndrome or something like that. Would you be taking advantage of someone like that?

You have consideration for others so long as they fit your definition of physically attractive. That's narcissistic.

BPD is a spectrum as well so you can have any assortment of symptoms of any Cluster B Personality and still be considered BPD.

you need to learn to do it