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» Got removed from wedding party. Thoughts ?
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post 1577205241 04-02-2019, 03:26 PM
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#91
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He probably kicked you out of his wedding party because you're such a rambling chit poster.

jk you were straight up replaced by someone. That is cold. But it saved you a lot of money; no gift, no renting a tux, no bachelor party, no travel expense.
post 1577205301 04-02-2019, 03:28 PM
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Maybe i'm in the minority on this one but cmon dog stop being a bish. There was a mix up. This isn't your big day, it's your buddy's big day. Just show up, support your friend and get yucky with the boys.
cya in hell idiots
post 1577205341 04-02-2019, 03:28 PM
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#93
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Go, eat lots of free food, drink lots of free drink then leave. No gift.
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post 1577205581 04-02-2019, 03:33 PM
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#94
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Originally Posted By bf527365
Spot on. Just wanted to make sure I wasn’t overreacting. I know if I had a wedding he would be in the party no questions asked.
This is all dependent on his reason. If you can actually talk to him and hear him out, that would be the only thing to change my mind. By your response, he didn't really care that he dropped you.

I'd just make sure that I know the full reason for being dropped. I also wouldn't take it to heart if I wasn't in someone's wedding party but they were in mine. One of the guys I picked I wouldn't be upset if he didn't include me in his. He's much more extroverted than I am, so I wouldn't feel upset if he had another select group of people he decided.
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post 1577205631 04-02-2019, 03:33 PM
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I used to play in a touring band and inevitably when we were home our manager would schedule us a wedding in our home town. I've seen weddings end friendships, family relationships and marriages. They are basically the perfect storm for stress, conflict and family drama.

Do the right thing by you and stay clear of attaching personal feelings...
post 1577205771 04-02-2019, 03:35 PM
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#96
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The best thing a friend could ever do for me is not invite me to his wedding.
post 1577205981 04-02-2019, 03:37 PM
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when he cucked you, you should have replied with

"who dis?"

and then when he said his name in the reply you should have said

"perfect let's reschedule"

and then got some reps. smh
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post 1577206301 04-02-2019, 03:43 PM
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#98
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Originally Posted By bf527365
He said “sorry I invited someone a long time ago and he still remembers so I have to”
Re-iterating my last post a bit but this is a chit excuse. Is he not aware he also asked you to be a part of it a long time ago?

His beating around the bush and not having a proper conversation is what would irk me the most.
post 1577206311 04-02-2019, 03:43 PM
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#99
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weddings are for women. Just leave the poor guy alone, he has enough to deal with having to go through it.

You know his wife fiance is the one who dropped you so just deal with it.
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post 1577206711 04-02-2019, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted By bf527365
So I’m from New York. I moved to another state about 7 years ago and all my best friends stayed behind.but we still keep in touch. One of best friends, who I’ve known since I was 16(30 now) called me last year and said hey man I’m getting married and I want you to be in my wedding party, do you want to be one of my best men?. I said of course man! I never heard anything again and the weeeing got pushed back to June of next year.i just assumed I was obv still in the wedding party since I was already asked. He was on business where I live and we met up for dinner. Anyway he was talking about the wedding and said I know you will be cool with sitting while the wedding goes in ( his way of saying not being in I guess)”I invited too many people” , I invited(one of his new friends ) a while ago and they still remembered I invited him so I have to have them. All while he invited me too? He never just said. Hey man I know I invited you but I have too many people. Either way it’s strange as I am one of his best friends. What would you do in this situation. I’m planning on ending my friendship with him and not going to the wedding.
His new friends that he picked over you are obviously doing things for him you never did. If you want him to swap you back in, offer him a reach around and see if takes it. If he still declines, they must be giving him a BJ so up the ante with tossing his salad. Its 2019 and heteroflexible is all the rage, men can experiment and not be gay so hes probably doing that with his new friends and that wasnt cool back in the day when you were boys.
post 1577206731 04-02-2019, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted By bf527365
Everyone saying free food lol. Do you not know you have to give at least 100$( if you’re cheap) when you go to a wedding ? It’s not free you pay for your plate.
wut? gifts are optional. you don't have to give anything
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post 1577206761 04-02-2019, 03:51 PM
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#102
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Originally Posted By bf527365
Everyone saying free food lol. Do you not know you have to give at least 100$( if you’re cheap) when you go to a wedding ? It’s not free you pay for your plate.
Not to mention the costs to travel. Here's the way I see it, you simply talk to your friend and straight-up ask him about what is going on and why he made such a decision and talk about it like men.
"If you don't believe in yourself then why is anyone else going to?"
post 1577207491 04-02-2019, 04:03 PM
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#103
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Originally Posted By crupiea
weddings are for women. Just leave the poor guy alone, he has enough to deal with having to go through it.

You know his wife fiance is the one who dropped you so just deal with it.
Even if it was the fiance that is behind this, his friend should've stood up for OP and demanded he be made a groomsman because of how strong their friendship is. The fact that OP says their whole best friend group were all made groomsman except him is extremely awkward. This whole situation exposes the "best" friendship for what it truly is and sullies it for life. There's really no coming back from this. There's no reminiscing when they're 70 about how they were groomsmen at each others' weddings. There will be a sense of hollowness and guilt forever hanging over the friendship.
post 1577207531 04-02-2019, 04:04 PM
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#104
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Originally Posted By skinnyfat88
Re-iterating my last post a bit but this is a chit excuse. Is he not aware he also asked you to be a part of it a long time ago?

His beating around the bush and not having a proper conversation is what would irk me the most.
My point man. Like bro you asked me too. Are you kidding me ? Insane
Hey
post 1577207691 04-02-2019, 04:07 PM
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#105
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Originally Posted By crupiea
weddings are for women. Just leave the poor guy alone, he has enough to deal with having to go through it.

You know his wife fiance is the one who dropped you so just deal with it.
if this is legit then the marriage will most likely fail in time as she doesn't respect her man, or his wishes. she has his balls already in a vice. RIP. you may as well go and pay your condolences. i am sure the misc can tell you want to say to him closer the time. let us know if the wedding gets pushed back again
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post 1577216841 04-02-2019, 06:15 PM
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#106
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I would not go. I would probably stop initiating conversations and just generally stop investing in the relationship. That's just my personal philosophy- I'm really loyal and put forth a lot of effort with my friends, so if I don't feel that I'm being valued the way I value them, then **** it, lol. Got to have some pride and know your worth, IMO.
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post 1577216951 04-02-2019, 06:16 PM
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#107
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calm down i research things for the laugher you autist
post 1577217421 04-02-2019, 06:24 PM
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#108
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It's funny you say that because I’m from New York. I moved to another state about 7 years ago and all my best friends stayed behind.but we still keep in touch. One of best friends, who I’ve known since I was 16(30 now) called me last year and said hey man I’m getting married and I want you to be in my wedding party, do you want to be one of my best men?. I said of course man! I never heard anything again and the weeeing got pushed back to June of next year.i just assumed I was obv still in the wedding party since I was already asked. He was on business where I live and we met up for dinner. Anyway he was talking about the wedding and said I know you will be cool with sitting while the wedding goes in ( his way of saying not being in I guess)”I invited too many people” , I invited(one of his new friends ) a while ago and they still remembered I invited him so I have to have them. All while he invited me too? He never just said. Hey man I know I invited you but I have too many people. Either way it’s strange as I am one of his best friends. What would you do in this situation. I’m planning on ending my friendship with him and not going to the wedding.
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post 1577217511 04-02-2019, 06:25 PM
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#109
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Real talk, go if it's not a hassle to go, but if you haven't talked to this guy other than about his wedding for the last 10 years then you don't really need to go out of your way to go.
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post 1577218241 04-02-2019, 06:33 PM
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#110
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I recently had a wedding, had a few people no gift us, one was a bridesmade, one was a good friend of mine. He wasnt in the wedding party, it did trigger me even though i know the one friend is poor.

My point is no gifts, and no shows are triggering.


If i was in your situation i would say ill be there then not go and send no gift, also cut contact. He will get the message.

Lets be honest here, the friendship is over and poisened anyways at this point.
post 1577218401 04-02-2019, 06:35 PM
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#111
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Originally Posted By keyboardworkout
Give you friend a break. He's in the process of planning the biggest mistake of his life. He can't think straight right now.
Best response ITT
Originally Posted By MrSchons
Go to the wedding and get blind drunk and get physically removed from the wedding.
This. If there’s not an “altercation” then you weren’t even there
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post 1577218711 04-02-2019, 06:39 PM
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same here but i dont like the person anyway thats why i deleted her im such a nice guy always polite
post 1577219041 04-02-2019, 06:43 PM
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#113
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Originally Posted By bf527365
So I’m from New York. I moved to another state about7 years agoand all my best friends stayed behind.but we still keep in touch. One of best friends, who I’ve known since I was 16(30 now) called me last year and said hey man I’m getting married and I want you to be in my wedding party, do you want to be one of my best men?. I said of course man! I never heard anything again and the weeeing got pushed back to June of next year.i just assumed I was obv still in the wedding party since I was already asked. He was on business where I live and we met up for dinner. Anyway he was talking about the wedding and said I know you will be cool with sitting while the wedding goes in ( his way of saying not being in I guess)”I invited too many people” , I invited(one of his new friends ) a while ago and they still remembered I invited him so I have to have them. All while he invited me too? He never just said. Hey man I know I invited you but I have too many people. Either way it’s strange as I am one of his best friends. What would you do in this situation. I’m planning on ending my friendship with him and not going to the wedding.
7 years is a long as time brah, you probably are not even in his top 10 best friends list anymore. Guys base their friends of proximity brah. we are simple like that.
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post 1577219261 04-02-2019, 06:47 PM
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#114
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I agree with the common sentiment itt. I wouldn't go out of my way to attend an out of state wedding if I got casually dropped like that. This situation doesn't really mean that your boy is POS and that you should get bitter over this, but at the same time this shows that at this point you guys aren't really anything more than acquaintances.
post 1577219731 04-02-2019, 06:55 PM
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#115
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Originally Posted By AlwaysFocus
I recently had a wedding, had a few people no gift us, one was a bridesmade, one was a good friend of mine. He wasnt in the wedding party, it did trigger me even though i know the one friend is poor.
Curious, what was the average amount of money you got?
post 1577219741 04-02-2019, 06:55 PM
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#116
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Originally Posted By bf527365
No he did not reduce the size. He basically kicked me out and now one of these kids hes known maybe 2 years tops is in. Maybe more who knows that’s all he said to me. I supported him through jail. Wrote him letters when everyone gave up on him. It’s just hurtful I don’t get it and wasn’t sure if I was overreacting or not.
Definitely inconsiderate on his part knowing how you stuck up for him. Maybe that's how he rolls and doesn't realize it. But I know as you get older, it's hard to maintain old friendships even if you live in the same town. I'd probably just send him a gift and not go if I were you.
#
post 1577230971 04-02-2019, 10:05 PM
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#117
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Originally Posted By Humungus
Curious, what was the average amount of money you got?
Thats hard to say the standard is 100$ even if you are single. To sort of answer your question the end of it all the average was much higher than 100$

But i definetly didnt "make money" getting married, but it didnt break me either.
post 1577231711 04-02-2019, 10:17 PM
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#118
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Well I only brought three, what you lookin' at me for?
post 1577233091 04-02-2019, 10:41 PM
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#119
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this thread... brb driving/flying 500+ miles for free food

x2 on how lame it is that pussy boi couldnt even be direct about it
post 1577234361 04-02-2019, 11:16 PM
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#120
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Meh... I've been part of the wedding party a few times, and it's not that great unless all the guys are super close friends. You have to do a bunch of BS with the photographer, videographer, ceremony stuff, etc. Just show up and chill.
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